The Grass Only Grows Where You Water It
by OdinsReaper
Summary: Lucille Marie Galvin learns she is no longer responding to cancer treatments. Her daughter finds a solution: go meet Genkai for a different kind of treatment or she'll drop out of college to take care of her mother full time. Her daughter's future is important, so she ventures out alone to the mysterious temple in the woods.
1. Bad News

Chapter 1:

"Bad News"

* * *

"What do you mean 'the treatments aren't working'?"

My tone could have come off nicer, considering the atmosphere and the situation. But that was the last thing I wanted to hear about my mother's condition and niceties were not my first priority.

I crossed my arms and stared heavily at the doctor, waiting for him to say something stupid and justify my reaction.

"Pookie, don't yell at the doctor. He knows what he's doing, even if we disagree with it."

My mother's calming voice and childhood nickname did nothing for me then. What he was saying was not fair! She couldn't be dying; it was too soon, we didn't have enough time!

"Your mother is no longer responding to any of the treatments we are giving her. I estimate you have about a year left, maybe more if you take care of yourself." The doctor sighed quietly to himself and shut his eyes briefly, opening them only to look at his watch before closing them again and pinching the bridge of his nose. "I have some time, so I'll remove your port now so you don't have to come back. Unfortunately there's nothing more I can do for you."

He turned around and set to work. The time it took for him to get his supplies and prep the area seemed like ages as I sat there and watched him, doing my best to keep my angry mouth shut. _How does this asshole get off without doing anything more? He acts like he doesn't even want to be here!_

20 minutes later, the port was out and she was stitched up with a brand new bandage on her breastbone.

"You are all set Mrs. Galvin. Just so you are aware, we plan to discontinue all treatments in order to try to make you as comfortable as possible. If you see the nurse at reception, she'll be able to give you information about hospice and home care." And with that, he walked out, leaving the door slightly ajar. Similar to the way my mouth was currently hanging, open on a hinge.

"What the FUCK. He _just_ told us you've stopped responding to treatments and his follow-up is _hospice?_ I swear to Bob I'm going to give him a piece of my mind." My mom's soft, weak grip on my hand stopped me in my tracks. She let go and began to speak.

"If there's nothing left to be done, let's go home so I can discuss this with your father and try to make arrangements early."

The smile on her face, the one that never ceases to quit no matter how bad the treatments affect her, is what forced my decision to leave quietly. I ran a hand down my face and turned around, situating myself behind her wheelchair, preparing myself to lead her out the door.

Cancer. Six letters, two vowels. But a whole hell of a lot of meaning and emotion held by the word itself. Her cancer isn't just six letters; Osteosarcoma has 12 letters. I've counted the letters many times trying to figure out why it chose _her._ Osterosarcoma is not just normal, boring cancer; it's an aggressive form of bone cancer that controls your life. You can get rid of it, but don't be surprised when it makes its appearance somewhere else in your body.

For most people it's an immediate death sentence before they slip into depression and let the disease take over. My mom? She took it as a new look on life, a reason to better herself and look at things with only positive inflection. Not that getting cancer changed her behavior much; Lucille Marie Galvin always looks at things positively. The diagnosis was just fuel to add to her powerful fire. One that burned me down and put an immediate stop to any sort of behavior or action I was heading towards.

You might wonder, how did my father react? He didn't, not at first at least. He heard the news and locked himself in their bedroom, only coming out to go to work. Once the information settled in his mind and took root, it induced a disease of a different kind. It's amazing what fear and anger can do to a person.

Mom patted my hand as it gripped the handle of her wheelchair, already knowing what I was thinking about and attempting to comfort me. With a soft sigh, she settled into the chair and smiled at everyone we passed, always trying to brighten someone's day.

Cancer. Osteosarcoma. Unresponsive to alternative medicines and aggressive treatments.

I pushed her quietly down the hall, passing reception without a second glance. They can take their hospice pamphlets and stuff them somewhere unpleasant; I do not need to hear another empty apology or see their fake smiles. They do nothing for her anyway.

"Actually I think I would like to get custard first, what do you think Pookie?"

Custard was our silent agreement that whatever we needed to talk to father about could wait; his reaction was surely one that would need preparation.

"Sprinkles sound good today."

* * *

Father reacted exactly how I expected: poorly and without tact.

"So that means you're going to die soon? Good thing we got the life insurance increased last month." He walked away quickly, back to his room.

My father's harsh words fell on deaf ears; mother knew to a point what he would say and chose instead to ignore it. He loves her, he really does. But he was raised to take things personally, even if they didn't involve him directly. He took her illness as an insult, forever worried about his reputation at work. I mean, _come on,_ how was he supposed to climb the ranks with a wife who was _sick?_ Get real.

Unfortunately for mother, his words aren't the only things he decided to use as signifiers for his anger. There have been many late-night trips to the emergency room because he just couldn't take it anymore. The worst part? Mother doesn't blame him for his actions; she _understands_ that what he's dealing with is difficult. Him? What about her?

I fear for her life, and not because of this fucking illness she has been diagnosed with.

Instead of dwelling on the treatment from my father, my mother chose instead to sit quietly at our dining room table with me and play cards.

"Mother, I'm going to do some research and ask around. If the idiot doctors at the hospital can't help you, I'll find someone who will."

I felt her eyes on me from her position across the table from me. She loves the sunshine and fresh air and will perch herself as close to an open window as possible. Some days she's well enough to go outside and actually enjoy it. Most days are spent in a comfortable chair inside. Our house is filled with comfortable chairs.

"Honey, you have college entrance exams to worry about. Your future. You don't need to be worrying about me on top of all of that."

"Uh, does this look like the face of someone who cares? No, I didn't think so. I'll drop out if it means helping you get better."

My knuckles turned white as I clenched them on the table, anger filling my veins. I closed my eyes and took a long, deep breath. _How can she just let this go so easily? Like her life doesn't matter?_

"If it means that much to you, I'll try whatever you find. But you are not dropping out of school. I'll die before I let that happen." I could hear the smile form on her face at the bad joke she made. "I'm kidding, but seriously if you find something I'll try it. No questions asked. Well, except if it involves eating dirt and running around a fire naked. I think I'll pass on that, thank you."

I opened my eyes and stared at her blankly, _Does she really think jokes like that will make me laugh?_

"Mom your jokes are not funny considering the situation. But I'll find something for you, don't worry. I'll look while I'm cooking dinner and make a few calls, see what I can dig up."

"Thank you for everything Pookie, I don't know what I would do without you."

I smiled at mother as I stood from the table. "You'd probably starve. And I'm not sure what would be a worse death."

She laughed lightly at my joke before standing carefully. Seems like she's not the only one poking fun at death today. I swear I'm going to Hell, but her laugh was music to my ears.

"I think I'm going to take a nap, dear. Wake me up when dinner is ready."

I watched her walk away, a light blue scarf swaying at her back instead of the long, dark hair I grew up with. She had lost her hair months ago and chose to cover her head with beautiful hijabs that we picked up on our travels with father across the world. No, we aren't Muslim, but mother likes the meaning behind the use of a hijab; it keeps her bald head modest and protects her privacy from people who just want to stare and ask awkward questions.

The doctors tried everything for her and nothing worked. She lost her hair, her nails grew brittle, and she lost so much weight most high school cheerleaders would be jealous. But she never lost her love of life. I admire that quality in her and strive to be everything that she is. I glanced out the window where I could see her work come to life. The breeze brought in the scent of different flowers planted by my mother.

She always says, "If I am running out of life, I may as well put some life back into the world." With a sigh I began pulling out pots and pans, preparing to make an organic, vegan dish for me and her to share together, courtesy of the vegetable garden that sat adjacent to the flower garden.

Once I got dinner started, I pulled out my computer and began my research. A certain name and address came up often in the search results and I wondered quietly how reliable this woman would be. A psychic? I know they exist but how could I trust that she's the real deal? At worst, she's a fake and mother uses her better judgment to stop going to her. At best, she's legitimate and she increases the amount of time mother has left.

I snatched a pen off the fridge and wrote down her information. No phone number, just an address to a temple in the woods. It would have to do.

* * *

NOTE: Not my first story ever, but definitely one I'm decently comfortable at publishing. I have a timeline in my brain that I plan to follow. I've been throwing different ideas around for a few weeks and this one came to me suddenly. Aren't those the best kinds?


	2. Living Dead Girl

Chapter 2:

"Living Dead Girl"

NOTE: The point of view will switch to the third person indefinitely.

* * *

Lucille Marie Galvin is a kind, compassionate woman, unafraid to speak her mind and tell people what she thought in a way that made them thank her for her opinion. She always tries to do her best to be positive, even in situations that seem completely hopeless. She was also scared shitless and wondering what possessed her to agree to her daughter's far-fetched plan to get her health back and extend her life.

But for all her efforts, she could not say no to traveling deep into the woods on the edge of town to find a mysterious psychic. _That's a new one for sure. I wonder what the doctors would say if they knew I was taking this trip._ Lucille knew she was dying, she knew there was very little chance of her life continuing beyond the end of the year. But her daughter's happiness was important and she had to at least show an effort to getting better.

Her thoughts focused on her daughter's life and how things would be once Lucille was completely gone. Distracted, she failed to notice that the taxi had stopped moving, parked at the entrance to a very long and ominous-looking path into the woods.

"This is it ma'am, I won't go no further than this. Though it's none of my business, what's a little thing like you wanting to go out into the woods like this on your own?" The gruff voice pulled her gaze from the window to his face. _I wonder what's got him so freaked out._ "A bit of light exercise for my health." His disbelieving eyes shifted to take in her sickly frame, knowing without being told that she was sick with something most people don't recover from. But it WAS none of his business, and he knew better than to pry into the affairs of others, especially if it meant protecting his ass from anything unpleasant. Lucille watched as his eyes looked up and down her body, knowing he wasn't doing it with any sort of sexual thoughts in mind. When his eyes met hers again, she could see that he wanted to stop her, prevent her from walking into the great unknown by herself.

Before he could act on those thoughts, she unbuckled her seat-belt and grasped the door handle, throwing it open and stepping out into the partial sunlight. She held the strap of her pack, pulling it with her automatically and without pause before she shut the car door with finality, effectively ending the conversation and any attempts he might have made to keep her inside the car until she was safely in front of a hospital. The taxi pulled away slowly, before finally picking up speed and traveling steadily down the dirt and gravel road. Lucille stood in the cloud of dust left behind in the wake of the taxi's departure, wondering to herself if she was ready for the trip ahead of her. From the maps Carrie printed off for her, it didn't look like a long walk. But she was weak and frail; a walk around the block will tire her out quickly these days.

Lucille looked down at the pack still clutched in her hand, testing its weight and determining how long she'll be able to carry it without her shoulders aching and her back on fire. With a sigh, she pulled the pack up and over her shoulder, stretching around to slide her arm through the other strap. A little bit of shuffling around settled the pack more comfortably, though it pulled on her frame not matter how she adjusted it.

The chemotherapy and radiation really took a lot out of Lucille and she was still getting used to the different changes that her body went through. She was essentially a new person, physically speaking at least, and she had to make adjustments based on what she could and couldn't do anymore. There were a lot of things she used to be able to do that she was no longer capable of and at times it got very frustrating. But she persevered.

The pack tugged uncomfortably on her head scarf, forcing her to pause and tug it back into place. Without any hair to hold the scarf in place it was often slipping and twisting around, wrapping tightly around her neck at times. "Bald and beautiful" became a way of life for her at home after she woke up one night out of breath with a bruised and sore throat. That experience was not something she ever plans on repeating, but the head scarf is necessary to prevent people from questioning her.

The pitying looks from adults she could handle. It was the innocent questions from children that made things so difficult. _How do you explain to a child that you have no hair because you're on your way to death_? Especially the ones that have no understanding of what death really is. _What are you supposed to say when they ask where you go?_ If they're religious it's obvious, Heaven is easy to explain to children. It's just a place a person goes to when they die. If they aren't religious, well, there are quite a few explanations for that one. But it's also important not to say the wrong thing. Telling a Catholic child that God doesn't exist and when he dies his body will decompose and feed the earth instead of going to Heaven is not exactly a good way to break the ice on any conversation. It just makes things awkward and uncomfortable for everyone involved. If given the choice, Lucille would gladly take the piteous stares. At least then she can ignore them and go on to enjoy what's left of her life.

A shock of bright yellow flashed across her eyes, temporarily blinding her until she wrestled the loose ends together and tucked them back into place. Lucille was never very good at wrapping her head scarves, no matter how long or often she wore them, and YouTube videos could only get her so far. _Those YouYube People just make it look so damn easy. Too bad Carrie isn't here to help me with this; she's always so good with her hands._

Sometimes it's hard to tell who the mother is in their situation with the way Carrie protects her mother and holds her so close. Even before Lucille got sick Carrie always wanted to coddle her and make sure she had everything she needed. And it wasn't just Lucille she tried to mother; it was a sight to see when a 7 year-old tried to baby an elderly woman whenever she had the opportunity. _At least I know she'll be okay when I'm gone, I won't need to worry about her taking care of herself. Although she_ does _have a hard time taking care of herself mentally._ Carrie was known for putting others before herself, even at the cost of her own happiness and comfort. She was even willing to risk her college career just so she could be there for Lucille on this trip.

" _Mother please, I can reschedule orientation! You need me there with you, what if something happens? What if you can't make it there on your own? There's no_ way _I can let you go alone and we both know dad isn't going with you! Come on, you know I'm right about this. "_

But Lucille needed to do this on her own, regardless of how sick or how tired she was. And Carrie needed to do something for herself, as well. There's no way Lucille would be able to live with herself (not that she would have to for very long) if she allowed Carrie to risk her future on a woman who won't even last a year. _This is MY illness, MY disease, MY suffering alone._ Why must she make this so difficult? Carrie will understand in the future, when she has children and a family of her own.

Lucille would do anything to protect her daughter's happiness and future. Even if it means going alone on a journey as terrifying as this one, both here and now in this forest and in the future when the end is near. Lucille would rather die alone than have to watch her daughter fall apart with sadness as she withered away. It was not fair to Carrie to have that image be the last thing she sees of her own mother.

Lucille shook her head, clearing away all thoughts of that time. She will clear that bridge when she gets to it. For now, she has to worry about clearing THIS bridge directly in front of her. Literally speaking, not metaphorically. She did not notice it at first, hidden behind the trees as it was. The red, wooden foot-bridge in front of her wasn't very long or high, but it was directly over a large stream-bed full of water. The storms from the night before really raised the water levels, making the normally calm water rush violently down the stream. _Here I am, facing death head on. But I can't even cross a damn stream without getting scared._

Lucille edged herself closer to the bridge, toeing it once she got close enough, silently testing the sturdiness of it. Not that her small feet would make much of an impact, but it helped her feel better regardless. Several deep breaths later, Lucille was inching her way across the bridge tightly holding onto the railing with one hand, her wooden cane clenched in her left. A large gust of wind floated through, making the bridge shudder and her scarf twist around her head.

She gasped and clenched the railing with both arms before yelling angrily, "Damn wind, you stop it! I just want to cross safely!"

As if the wind heard her cry, it settled down slowly, laying her scarf around her shoulders delicately. Lucille closed her eyes and tucked her head into the corner of her arm as it rested on the railing. Several minutes later, she decided she was ready to continue her trek across the bridge, telling herself she needed to move before the wind picked back up.

On the other side of the bridge, Lucille was able to really take in what lay ahead of her. _It's gorgeous._ A leaf-strewn path stretched ahead of her, surrounded by tall Oak trees that have clearly been there for several hundred years. Sunlight peaked through the canopy of leaves over-head, creating a filtered effect that dampened the intensity of the sun and made the area darker than it would be otherwise. The path did not look man-made but it was well-worn as if it were travelled frequently for years; the growth surrounding and covering it now made it seem as though the path was walked less frequently in recent years.

Lucille was captivated by the beauty of it, pausing her steps to take in everything around her. _First the bridge and now this… I'm never going to get there in a timely manner. I wonder what kind of history and life this place holds…_ With her thoughts dancing around the historically possibilities of this path and the bridge connected to it she began to walk, carefully making her way over the multitude of leaves and sticks that settled in her way.

* * *

The walk itself took longer than she expected and not just because she was captivated by the beauty of the foliage around her. To be honest, the novelty of it wore off quickly after seeing hundreds of leaves and Oak trees that look the same. This "light exercise" in the forest was really shaping up to be enough for an entire month.

Despite the soreness already beginning to settle in her muscles, Lucille pushed on, only stopping periodically to rest. Walking with a cane was new to her and the muscles of her shoulder and back stiffened quickly. This was nothing like the casual wheelchair strolls through the park directed by Carrie. Two hours later, Lucille was still walking, sticky sweat plastering the edges of her scarf to her neck and face. It felt heavier than she was used to with the sweat beginning to soak through it.

As sharp pains started to shoot through her joints, Lucille decided it was time to stop again and actually rest her body while she could. She moved through the trees carefully, looking for a fallen tree thick enough to sit comfortably on. Several minutes later she found one that was perfect, reaching as tall as the middle of her thigh and thicker than her arms could wrap around. Lucille sat down carefully, being mindful that some parts of the tree have already started to decay and fall apart. The last thing she needed was to find herself wedged into a tree and unable to extract herself from it. She turned her face to the canopy again as sunlight peeked through the leaves above her, creating golden rays of light that struck the ground at odd angles. She smiled happily as birds began to chirp around her, playing her a song that only some stop long enough to listen to.

The sharp rustle of bushes behind her made the smile drop from her face in a flash. She moved her head and turned slowly, looking over her shoulder as conspicuously as she could without moving too much of her body. A sharp snort escaped her nose when she saw the wiggling snout of a brown rabbit browsing through the surrounding grass. She gently turned the rest of the way, wholly prepared to befriend the beautiful creature.

Before she could slide off the trunk and onto her knees, a dark, winged creature leapt out of the same bush and tackled the rabbit. Lucille fell back onto the grass behind her, landing on her upper back with her legs splayed in the air, startled out of her seat. The peaceful sunlight now stabbed sharply into her eyes, blinding her and adding to her fear. Scrambling to her knees as quickly as she could, she peered over the edge of the tree trunk looking for the mysterious creature. The fluffy rabbit was no longer there, instead replaced by an over-sized bat.

 _How strange,_ She thought. _I've never seen a bat that large. Or during the day…_ She silently studied the creature, contemplating its existence, when deep red eyes suddenly turned and were staring directly at her. Sharp white fangs revealed themselves in the mockery of a grimace before the creature began stalking her way. _This is ridiculous, 45 years old and I'm hiding from a bat behind a tree._

Dark, leathery wings unfurled themselves as the bat grew closer. She could see the veins and ligaments in the wings as clear as day. The smell of it reached her as it closed the distance between them step by step, but suddenly it stopped. Its tiny nose started twitching, not unlike the brown rabbit it had just devoured, as it sniffed the air in front of it.

Lucille held her breath, hoping that doing so would hide her from the bat or at the very least make it more difficult to find her. _I may have accepted my death but that doesn't mean I want to be eaten alive by an overgrown rat with wings._

She prepared herself, tensing her muscles ready to fight, or run, or something other than just sit there. Right before she would have launched herself from her position, it sneezed and took off without preamble, flying high and far into the trees and out of sight. _Well, that was even stranger. Though I am not complaining one bit._

With the danger out of the way, Lucille took a moment to collect herself before standing. _'Taking a moment' is what got me in this mess to begin with. I wonder why it flew away so quickly?_

After snatching her cane from the forest floor where it had fallen, Lucille turned sharply and marched her way back onto the path, ignoring the musical birds and the gentle breeze that flowed through the trees. A few turns and twenty minutes of walking later, Lucille found herself at the base of a tall set of stairs.

"Oh, you have got to be kidding me. The monster bridge and endless path wasn't enough? This has to be a test."

The Oak trees continued on up the hill, lining both sides of the stairway and creating a cover from the sun. The height of the stairs made it difficult to see what lay beyond them, leaving everything to the imagination. _Maybe a hot bath and a comfortable bed!_

Well, if wishes were fishes anyway. Without pause, Lucille took the first step and pushed herself to the top, limiting the amount of breaks she took so she could reach the top faster. The spiritual tags stretching across the stairs caught her eye but she paid them no mind, determined to reach her destination.

At the top of the stairs she froze, caught up by the beauty of the green sloping roofs and the red paneling of the Shinto-style doors. A porch stretched around the entire temple with small sets of stairs placed in significant spots along the way.

A smile stretched across Lucille's face with the thrill of finally reaching it. _Oh how I wish Carrie could see this, she would love it's beauty and design! Maybe someday…_ She took a brief second to straighten her clothing and scarf once again before walking toward the building. She climbed the smaller set of stairs with ease and stood firmly in front of the door, steeling her nerves before sharply rapping on the door.

The sound echoed in the courtyard and she glanced around, wondering if it was loud enough to be rude or not loud enough at all. Stuck in her worries, she was surprised when the door slid smartly open. Her wide eyes and slack jawed-look was greeted with a set of bored apple-colored eyes. Her eyes widened further when the man in front of her began sniffing the air, nose twitching like the peaceful rabbit she intended to befriend earlier.

"You smell like death."

* * *

NOTE: The title credits belong to Rob Zombie. I originally had a different title for this but this came on my Pandora one day and I thought it fit considering the scene with the bat ^_^

I have found that writing in the third person is much easier for me. I can get things across easier and in more detail and overall I think it's a better story in the end.


	3. When Worlds Collide

Chapter 3:

"When Worlds Collide"

* * *

"They've been in there for a long time." Kuwabara murmured quietly to Yusuke as they sat in the kitchen of the temple. "I wonder what they could be talking about."

"She's probably an old friend of Genkai's, here to catch up on old lady shit. Did you see her? She looks like she's in her sixties. And what's up with that thing on her head?" Yusuke crossed his arms and slid down in his chair, tilting the chair up on its back two legs as he went.

"I don't know man, she looked sick."

"Or maybe it's none of your business what she's here for and you should be more respectful of my clients." Genkai's gravelly voice cut through the two of them, making them both jump in surprise. Neither heard her walk through the door behind them and weren't expecting it when she spoke. "This is Lucille Galvin. You'll be seeing her around the temple every two weeks, so be nice and treat her with respect."

Lucille stood directly behind Genkai but you could still see her completely despite her position behind the psychic. Standing at 5'6", Lucille had over a foot of height on the older woman but respect could still be seen in her posture; she was not a woman who thought herself better than others. Lucille Galvin knows when she needs help and understands the importance of respecting those that intend to help her, despite their size, age, creed, or otherwise.

"It's nice to meet you!" A bright smile cracked the worn and tired face and she stepped around Genkai with her hand held out. Immediately her smile fell and she jerked her hand back to her chest before snapping into a bow. "I apologize. I am still stuck in my Western traditions and often forget the typical customs here."

Kuwabara stood up from the table with a smile and a bow before he held out his hand, a peaceful gesture to show Lucille that she was welcome and they were not offended by her foreign ways. "Kazuma Kuwabara, pleasure to meet you!" Yusuke snorted through is nose before standing as well, offering a curt bow before shoving his hands into his pockets.

"Just great, another old lady we have to deal with." Yusuke muttered under his breath as he turned around.

Kuwabara snatched Yusuke in a head lock. "This here is Yusuke Urameshi. Don't mind him; he's a punk with no manners." Kuwabara let him go quickly, not wanting to give Lucille a bad impression on her first day at the temple.

"I'd watch it if I were you son, I may be 45 years old but I can still kick your ass 6 ways from Sunday." Lucille spoke with a light smile on her face, knowing her words would get a rise out of Yusuke. "But I suppose those words typically need something to back them up and unfortunately at this stage of my life I don't have the capacity for that. I can still beat you at a mean game of 'Go Fish' though."

Her words garnered two reactions, one she was expecting and one she was not.

Kuwabara stood gaping at her before he exclaimed in shock, "Only 45! But you look so much older than that!" At that Genkai leapt up and placed a quick smack to the back of his head for his statement. "I said respect, dimwit!"

Yusuke however kept his back turned and while his shoulders shook silently with what Lucille assumed was anger. It was to her surprise when his head snapped back suddenly and loud guffaws of laughter escaped his throat.

"Oh man, you really got me there lady. That was a good one. It's nice to meet you too!" Yusuke finally turned to face her with a smile on his face, returning the one she originally gave him. He stuck out his hand for her to shake, a clear sign of peace between them, and she grasped it firmly.

"Well, not that you're acquainted with the local dimwits, follow me and I'll show you around." Lucille turned and smiled at Genkai this time before giving the two boys a small wave and following her back out the door.

Yusuke and Kuwabara turned and looked at each other as the two women left, different expressions settled on their faces. "Can you believe she's really only 45?"

* * *

"Based on what we discussed earlier, I think this room will best suit your needs. It will remain your room even when you leave, so don't worry about taking everything with you."

Genkai opened a door halfway down a long hallway. It revealed an average size room, big enough for a full size bed, an end table, and a small dresser. At the far end of the room, directly across from the door, was a Shinto style door that Lucille assumed was a closet. She raised an eyebrow at the different things presented to her, but said nothing.

"I know what you're thinking. Just because this is a Japanese temple does not mean I'm not open to other cultures. Part of the reason I selected this room was so you would have a more comfortable bed given your… condition." Genkai turned from Lucille back to the room and stepped through the door.

It took a handful of steps for her to cross the room and slide back the door to reveal a doorway to a small garden. As soon as she caught sight of what lay behind the door, Lucille was stepping forward as well and making her way outside. Genkai moved out of her way and silently followed behind, allowing the other woman to take everything in.

"This may take me some time to get back in order." Lucille turned herself in circles as she observed the overgrowth, going through in her mind the different things she would need and how she would get started.

"I'm patient enough; I expect you to be working here for a while." To anyone else, that statement would seem harsh, as if Genkai was expecting her skill to be lacking. To Lucille, it was a sign of confidence in her health and she smiled, happy that someone finally saw her future in a positive light.

"It's perfect. Honestly, you could give me a corner in a shed and I would be happy. This is more than I could ever ask for." Lucille smiled at Genkai, grateful for the things that were being given to her to benefit her life.

"We have already discussed your payment." Genkai smirked. "I think today we will just take time to get acquainted. I understand your journey here was difficult." Lucille nodded and followed Genkai back into the room, _her_ room, and into the hall. They turned right, away from the direction they originally came.

"This is the bathroom, close in proximity to your room. It will be beneficial when you have bad days." Lucille understood that to mean when her body began shutting down. It was not something she ever looked forward to of course but she knew it was inevitable. The things she would face would not be pleasant and she could only hope that she would be able to handle it on her own. To think that involving someone else in that experience made her shudder, worried about preserving the dignity of others rather than her own.

"Genkai, I appreciate you not approaching this as taboo. Most everyone else treats me as if I'm some abomination and I appreciate the normality." Lucille stood calmly beside her as she spoke, making eye contact so Genkai would understand the sincerity in her words.

"Lucille, you are just a person who is sick and needs help. That is all." Genkai turned to look her in the eyes, sharing a moment of understanding that only two older women who have both had their share of experience of the cruelty in the world would reach. Glancing back into the bathroom, Lucille decided she would wait until later to examine the room further.

"Your room does have its downfalls. You are mostly secluded in this area, but if you call, someone will hear and they will come. I will speak to the others and alert them to your presence here. You are welcome to explore the temple but I must warn you to be cautious. Not all of these rooms are as innocent as yours." Genkai's voice was firm but non-threatening.

"I understand ma'am. Is there a place I can store my things for the garden? I can bring some tools from home on my next visit."

"I don't think that will be necessary, though you may want to bring some organic materials. I will show you where everything is kept and you can decide what you need from there." Lucille nodded and turned to walk beside Genkai, feeling the ache begin to creep back into her shoulders and sharp pains returning to her joints. She left her bag in the kitchen upon her arrival, but walking was beginning to get tiresome.

"There is a shed not too far from your garden doorway that houses all of the tools you may need."

"I think I will check that out later if you don't mind. I would like to rest for a while."

"I understand. Dinner will be ready soon anyway." Genkai led the way back through the halls, passing Lucille's room and moving towards the kitchen. "Would like you some tea while we wait?"

"Do you have any coffee by chance?"

"I do not at present but I think I can work something out if you give me some time." Lucille pouted but shrugged, unfazed by the answer.

"No need, water will be fine. Please don't go out of your way to get me anything." Genkai said nothing but said nothing, continuing on and through the door of the kitchen, startling Kuwabara and Yusuke out of their small argument. Kuwabara snapped up and pulled a chair out for Lucille, helping her to sit at the table.

"Thank you Kazuma, I appreciate that." She sighed and settled, getting comfortable in everyone's presence.

Yukina stepped out of the kitchen and gave a small "Oh!" when she saw Lucille sitting at the table. She smiled at the young demon and stood, offering a bow and a smile, before sitting back down.

"I'm sorry for my poor manners but I'm not feeling too well at the moment. My name is Lucille Galvin." Yukina smiled and set down the dish she was carrying, offering a bow to the older woman.

"My name is Yukina. It's a pleasure to meet you."

Lucille smiled again, "Everyone here is so pleasant, it's a nice change of pace."

"Oh you say that now but you haven't met the shrimp yet. He will change your mind real quick." Kuwabara and Yusuke snickered to each other.

"Is that the young man with the red eyes I met when I arrived? He didn't seem too bad, just quiet." Lucille took her fingers and spread one eye open, emphasizing her point before shrugging.

"I think a better term would be 'hot-tempered'!" Yusuke burst out laughing at something that was only funny to him. Kuwabara looked nervous and turned his gaze to Genkai.

"Hey!" He whisper-screamed, cupping his hand around the edge of his mouth to block more of the sound. Lucille raised her eyebrows but said nothing; she could very clearly hear the young man. "Does she know that you-know-who is a you-know-what?" At this, Lucille quirked one eyebrow, wondering what it was he was getting at.

"Yes, dimwit. She knows about demons and Spirit World. Considering the nature of our agreement, I thought it best to bring her up to speed on everything so there wouldn't be any surprises in the future." Genkai rolled her eyes and sat down, amazed by the stupidity she was surrounded with.

Lucille chuckled lightly when Kuwabara sighed exaggeratedly, "Well, that's a relief. Wait! Why aren't you freaking out? I mean, that's a logical reaction for anyone who has just learned demons are real."

"I rely on solid-based evidence. If you show me a duck, and you say it's a duck, I'm going to believe it's a duck if you lay out exactly what makes it a duck. The same thing goes with demons. Hiei is the one who answered the door for me and no human _I_ know has eyes, teeth, and _energy_ like that. It just makes sense."

"Right, but-"

"I mean of course I don't believe everything that I'm told. I use my own observation and deduction skills. If you show me a duck and you say it's a cow, I'm not going to believe you without the proper evidence. Oh I do have a question though. On my way here, I met an oversized bat. Was that a demon?"

Shock spread across Genkai's face while Yusuke chuckled and smiled. "Oh you met Baldok? How is that guy doing? Haven't seen him since my first day here." Lucille frowned and shook her head slowly.

"Uh, no it didn't give me a name. It looked like a regular bat with red eyes, but bigger. It sneezed when it smelled me though. Maybe it's allergic to me?" Lucille talked with her hands, pointing at her eyes and then holding her hands in the air about two feet apart before she put her hands up in the air in an 'I don't know' gesture. She dropped her hands to her lap when the door slid open.

"It's because you smell disgusting, not because it was allergic to you, idiot woman." A grimace of disgust was fixed on Hiei's face and he stayed near the door, not willing to venture further into the room.

Lucille blinked comically at him before lifting each arm in turn and smelling herself. Hiei watched this and rolled his eyes. "What do you mean I smell disgusting?" Kuwabara and Yusuke leaned toward her as well, sniffing the air in front of them, before looking at each other.

"We don't smell anything on her." Hiei scoffed again and even Yukina chuckled lightly.

"Miss Lucille, I smell it too. I hope you don't take offense to this, but uhm, well you-"

"You smell like a dead body that has been left to rot in the sun for too long." Hiei's firm voice cut off Yukina's quiet one, startling her and forcing a gasp at the end of her sentence.

"Hiei, no! She does not smell like that at all! She just-"

Hiei sighed, cutting her off again. "We can smell the disease in your body, slowly taking over. We smell the cells as they die, filling your body. That is why the demon did not attack you, it could smell the diseased flesh and wanted no part of that for its meal." The disgusted look returned to his face and he stepped further into the kitchen, away from the dining table.

Lucille grimaced and looked at her hands on the table. "I'm sorry I didn't realize it was that bad."

"What disease?" Lucille looked at Yusuke when he spoke and then glanced at Genkai when she snapped at him to be respectful. He continued watching her, a determined look in his eyes.

Another glance at Genkai, "No surprises, right?" And back to Yusuke. "I have a rare form of bone cancer called Osteosarcoma. I stopped responding to treatments so I came here to find alternative methods of extending my life." She was surprised when Yusuke nodded but looked at her no differently.

"… Does it hurt?" Kuwabara spoke up for the first time, in a small voice as if he were scared of the reaction his question may bring. He didn't want to upset the woman by being rude, he had a feeling he was going to like her.

"It does at times, but I manage the pain as best I can." Sympathy filled Kuwabara's eyes.

Hiei scoffed from the kitchen, "Don't let the idiot fool you, she's in constant pain. She just doesn't show it." Lucille sighed and leaned back in her chair, choosing to say nothing on the matter.

"Actually Genkai, I think I would like to spend some time in the garden tonight. I appreciate your hospitality." Genkai nodded and Lucille slowly stood from her chair, grabbing her bag as she went and moving carefully out of the room. She could feel everyone's eyes on her as she went but she did not stop or turn.

Yukina's soft voice reached her ears through the door. "But she hasn't had any dinner, will she be okay?"

She did not listen for a reply and instead continued walking, seeking solitude in the earth and its calming presence.

* * *

By the time Lucille made it to her room, the pain in her joints made it nearly unbearable to walk. She stopped in the doorway and stared at the bed, bare of any sheets or pillows. Not bothered by it in the slightest, Lucille carefully set her bag next to the dresser before sitting on the edge of the bed; that movement alone caused pain to shoot through her hips and up her spine. She froze and waited for the heat to subside before toeing off her shoes and easing back onto the bed. She sighed as her body settled into the firm mattress, slowly releasing the pent up tension in her muscles.

A throbbing ache pulsed in her shoulders, hips, and knee, one that came and went based on her activity. She would definitely be utilizing the bath tonight to soothe the pain; she wouldn't be able to sleep otherwise.

Despite the aches, she began to drift off to sleep, exhaustion seeping from her bones. She was not used to using this much energy in one day or at all for that matter. She winced at the thought of making that trip every two weeks but remembered that it would be good for her in the long run; the exertion from the walk would build strength in her muscles, strength that left her long ago.

Right before sleep completely pulled her into its deep embrace, a knock sounded on the door. Lucille opened her eyes and pushed herself up from the bed, trying to be as presentable as possible.

"Come in." Lucille turned her body to face the door, expecting to see Genkai but was surprised when Yukina poked her head around the door. Kuwabara's face appeared in the doorway as well, a tray held in his hands and a large grin on his face.

"I'm sorry to disturb you Lucille, but you left before dinner was ready and I wanted to be sure you ate. I hope you don't mind the intrusion." Yukina bowed and smiled.

"Oh not at all Yukina I appreciate it very much! You are too sweet." Lucille made to get up but Yukina stopped her, taking the tray from Kuwabara's hands and placing it on the bed in front of her.

"Please don't get up, it isn't necessary. Oh! Kazuma, will you please sit with her for a moment? I need to go fetch something." Yukina scurried out of the room before he could offer to get it for her.

Kuwabara turned back to Lucille as she looked over the meal placed before her. "Yukina is something else. Is there anything else I can get for you?" He held his hands out, palms up, as an offering gesture. Lucille smiled at him and patted the foot of the bed, offering him a place to sit.

"This is more than enough. Please, sit down. You're so tall I feel the need to bring you down to me level!" Lucille sipped her water and took a bite of the vegetable stir fry the pair brought to her. "Although I suppose it is proper manners to offer a seat to a guest." She winked at him when he stared at her, taking a moment to realize she was only kidding.

Yukina stepped back into the room, a bundle of blankets and pillows gathered in her arms. Lucille stared at her in surprise, shocked at the hospitality of the young demon who gathered the bedding without being asked.

"I hope these will make the bed more comfortable to sleep in. Once you have finished eating I will make the bed up for you." Yukina set the bundle on the dresser and turned to smile at Lucille.

"I appreciate that but you have already done so much for me. Please, let me make my own bed. I'm sure there are other things you would rather be doing."

"Oh, no! Do not worry at all. I am happy to help you. But if you request it, I will leave this for you."

Lucille nodded and turned back to her meal, considering the exchange. Most people, after learning of her condition, would do everything they could to take care of her and do everything for her. Yukina surprised her with that but she chose not to point it out, wondering if it would be offensive to refuse such an offer.

Lucille finished her food and stood to thank Yukina properly for it before grabbing the tray and heading for the door. Kuwabara jumped up and made to take the tray but stopped when Yukina's hand rested on his arm. She shook her head and smiled, understanding the woman's need to do things on her own. They followed behind, silently ensuring the woman made it there without fail. She left her cane in the room so she could use her both hands to carry the tray. Her journey was slow but she was determined.

Lucille paused at the door to the kitchen, faced with a closed door and no hands to open it. She heard two pairs of footsteps behind her and she acted quickly. Toeing the base of the door, she slid it open just enough so she could slip through. She headed straight for the sink, placing the tray on the counter so she could transfer the dishes to be washed. She tugged her sleeves to her elbows and set to work, eager to contribute during her stay.

Genkai sat at the table and watched the scene unfold before her. She observed a sick woman, set on caring for herself and doing things on her own. Followed by two people who wanted to do everything they could so she didn't have to do things alone. It was definitely a sight to see and she could not help but chuckle at the spectacle before her.

Lucille set the last dish in the drying rack, draining the basin and scrubbing out any remaining food particles. Once her heads were clean and dry, she clapped them and turned around, beaming at the trio watching her. "I feel much better. Thank you so much for dinner."

She stepped away from the sink and moved through the door, ignoring their concerned looks with a smile. She headed slowly back to her room, intending to settle in and prepare for the bath.

Lucille smiled softly as she entered the room, carefully going over the things she needed to do before her bath. Her first move was the make the bed up as bed as she could without exerting too much energy. The bundle Yukina brought was full of soft, rose-colored sheets and a down comforter that matched. The pillows were medium-grade and smelled fresh; Lucille hugged the pillow to her chest and sighed happily.

It did not take her long to make the bed neatly, smoothing out the sheet before she stepped away to empty her bag. At the very bottom of her pack was a small bag of toiletries. She set it on top of her towel and fresh change of clothes and stared at her cane with her hands on her hips.

 _Do I really need it? The bathroom isn't that far..._

Lucille nodded firmly to herself and gathered her small bundle up, forgoing the cane with confidence. Halfway down the hall she realized leaving it behind was a poor decision, angry at herself for not accounting for her earlier exertion during her journey to the temple. With a grunt, she leaned against the wall and slid down, stretching her legs out to remove any pressure from her joints. The bundle she carried was discarded to the side, forgotten in her efforts to soothe the pains long enough to get her the final ten feet to the bathroom.

 _This is absolutely ridiculous. I can't even walk ten feet without assistance. Carrie would be having a fit if she saw me here on the floor._

Her tired fingers worked at the muscles surrounding her right knee, kneading and pulling, massaging out the knots that had appeared there. She moved to her left knee next, doing her best to match the movements always made by both Carrie and her physical therapist.

A few stretches later and Lucille believed herself to be ready to go, gathering her bundle up in her arms again before shifting her knees under her. Her hips protested and sharp, hot pains shot through them, forcing her back onto her behind unwillingly.

Glancing down the hall again, Lucille wondered idly to herself. _I wonder if I can crawl the rest of the way without anyone noticing…_

"You'll be judged as weak and helpless and based on your earlier actions I don't think you want that." Lucille gasped and stared up at Hiei, not realizing he was standing there until he spoke.

"How did you know what I was planning?" Hiei crouched down in front of her, looking at her with bored eyes but saying nothing. When she opened her mouth to ask what he wanted, he leaned forward and grabbed around her waist, lifting her into his arms.

"Hey! You put me down mister! I'm a lady and you need to ask first before you go around picking me up!" Hiei chuckled lightly and shifted her weight, making her more comfortable.

"It's only ten feet, I think you'll survive. But then again, maybe not." Lucille pouted but held tightly to her bundle of clothes and toiletries, annoyed that she got herself into this mess. Hiei held her unlike anyone else ever had; her diaphragm rested against his shoulder but not painfully. One arm was circled around her upper thighs beneath her bottom, supporting her entire weight but not hurting her.

"I'm sorry that my smell disturbs you. I would offer to scrub it away but I understand that it's not as simple as that." Hiei glanced up at her and looked away, remaining silent.

The ten foot walk was short with Hiei leading the way. He slid open the bathroom door and deposited her on a shower stool before exiting. Lucille stared at the closed door and listened to his receding footsteps, grateful that he didn't wait around for her to finish.

Not moving from her seat, Lucille stripped off her clothes and scrubbed the dirt and sweat from her body with the fruit-scented soap she brought with her. Freshly scrubbed and rinsed, she turned on her seat and faced the tub. Her hips protested at just the thought of moving but she made the effort, determined to enter the tub on her own. The cover she noticed earlier was removed, placed off to the side.

After several minutes of straining and struggling, Lucille settled into the tub with a contented sigh, feeling the tension ease away from her muscles. She would remain in the water as long as she could, so long as no one disturbed her.

* * *

 _NOTE: Title credits to Powerman 5000. I have been jamming this song a lot lately trying to get out of a crazy funk. Long and boring chapter but it sets things up for the future._

 _Thanks to my lovely reviewer: Graphospasm!_


	4. Loss of Composure

Chapter 4:

"Loss of Composure"

* * *

Genkai sat in her tea room, quietly going over the conversation she had with Hiei and wondering if he would respect her wishes. They had spoken shortly after Lucille had departed for her room the first time.

" _I have a guest that will be staying here every few weeks."_

" _I noticed, unfortunately."_

" _You don't have to interact with her, or speak with her, or do anything for her. All I ask is that if you do any of those things, you treat her with respect. She is dying and a woman like her deserves to live out her final days with dignity."_

" _And what exactly does that have to do with me?"_

" _Your interactions with others aren't always sunshine and rainbows. While I have no doubts that she can handle your gruff attitude, I would like her time here to be peaceful."_

" _You have taken a liking to this woman. Do you see your missed opportunities in her?"_

" _That is neither here nor there. It is my understanding that life at home for her is not pleasant. I do not want that to continue here."_

" _So you want me to coddle this woman, treat her like a child with a skinned knee. She is weak; I should do her a favor and end her suffering now."_

" _A woman who endures such pain and continues to think about the welfare of others is not weak. In fact, you might be able to learn a thing or two from her."_

 _Hiei scoffed and left the room without another word._

Genkai sighed and puffed on her pipe, wondering if her request was too great to fulfill for the demon. She wasn't asking him to interact with her at all; if he chose to completely ignore Lucille during her time at the temple that was fine too.

She shifted her thoughts to the woman herself, wondering how she would be able to help her.

* * *

Carrie sat in an alcove outside her school's library, mapping out her classes for the semester. She had a heavy workload, taking more classes than necessary. Carrie knew she was taking on too much but she enjoyed the distraction; for her, having an idle mind was dangerous for her health. And with her mother's condition, having too much time to think was never good.

Carrie sighed and pulled out her phone, checking for any messages from her mother. Today is the day she was supposed to travel out to the physic's temple and ask for help. Carrie hadn't yet heard from her mom that day and she wanted to call and find out how things were going. But knowing her mom, she would receive a lecture about not worrying so much and to enjoy her orientation.

Orientation had been over for hours but she didn't want to go home yet. She was enjoying the atmosphere at school; so many people around enjoying the day and just living in each other's company. It was a refreshing change; she would definitely love living on campus once school started.

She checked her phone again before shoving it into her back pocket, deciding to take her mother's perceived advice and not worry. If something was wrong, she would call.

A shout called her way and she turned her head to see a bright green Frisbee flying towards her. She jumped out of her chair to catch it before throwing it back with a smile and a laugh.

She glanced down at the mess on her table that she created in her efforts. Her computer sat open, pushed to the back edge of the table. A planner sat open in front of it, flipped to the month of December where she had just finished writing in her class schedule. She hated the damn thing but it helped so much sometimes. Her only issue was sticking with it.

She glanced back to the group playing Frisbee and decided to give up on her failing attempt at planning and join the game.

* * *

348 days.

She had 365 days left from the day the doctor told her she wasn't responding to treatments. It took her 17 days to get to the temple. She had 348 days left.

 _What does a person do when they realize their days are numbered?_

Apparently, they plant gardens and flowerbeds.

Lucille sat back on her feet and placed her hands on her thighs, looking at what she had laid out before her.

A shovel with a broken handle, splintered at the end. A rake with bent teeth. A hoe, thankfully intact. An array of hand tools, including a cultivator, a trowel, and a tiller. All of the seeds she found were dead and no longer usable. And finally she found a small tote, dirty and torn in some places but whole where it mattered. She was thankful for the tote; it made carrying things to and from the shed much easier.

The tools she had would be enough to get the job done; she didn't need anything new or fancy to do what she loved. But she would have to gather seeds and make a plan for the entire garden. As she looked around, her mind processed how much work it would need before she could plant anything in the earth.

 _At least I have some time to decide how I want to lay this out._

Lucille already knew a large section of the garden will be devoted to fresh fruits and vegetables. She had gotten a glimpse into the fridge and it was seriously lacking. The remaining areas would be for different types of flowers. If she had enough time, she would tend to other areas around the temple.

Lucille hoped she had enough time for that. It was finally starting to sink in that she had cancer.

Yes, she has had cancer for 5 years now. And _now_ it was starting to sink in. Why did it take so long? She knew from the beginning her chances of survival were low but she stayed positive through it all. Until now.

 _What changed?_

She shook her head, clearing the negativity away. This was not the place for it. She knew depression was a very real possibility considering her condition but she did her best to keep it at bay.

 _Maybe it was the death sentence. It wasn't real until my life was given a time limit._

Lucille got more comfortable and looked around the yard, knowing she wouldn't be able to shake the thoughts for a while. She could hear the birds chirping happily, squirrels chattering away in the trees, the wind rustling the leaves softly. She lay back in the grass and took it all in. The life surrounding her that would continue on without her presence in the world. It was beautiful and peaceful and scary all at once.

"When you offered to take care of the gardens in return for my assistance, I didn't think you would spend the time napping in the grass."

Lucille tilted her head back to look at Genkai as she stepped away from the house.

"Not napping, developing. I need a plan before I can get started."

"I see. Well, I think now is an ideal time for _us_ to get started." Genkai turned away, back toward the temple.

Lucille rolled over and up from the grass, using her cane as leverage. She wanted to give her joints a break from the day prior so she used the cane no matter how much she hated it.

"Considering your physical state, my plan is to focus on the health of your mind. This isn't simply a mind over matter type of situation but the better state your mind is in the easier it will be for you to build your physical strength back up."

Lucille paused before speaking, wondering if Genkai knew the state her mind was in at the moment. "So what's the first step?" Lucille limped behind at a slow but steady pace, a look of pure interest on her face.

"The first step is an assessment of your mental state. I need to be prepared if there's a chance you might fall into depression and kill yourself early in my temple."

"I don't think you'll have to worry about that ma'am but I understand regardless."

"There is an inner garden we will be utilizing for the majority of our time together. You are welcome to use the garden on your own time but I think your attentions will be focused elsewhere." Genkai walked through the halls at an even pace, seemingly taking random turns whenever there was an opportunity.

"You know I would love to use it but I need to be able to find the place on my own before I can." Genkai chuckled at the exasperated sound in Lucille's voice but did nothing to ease her concerns.

Since Lucille was lost, it seemed like the trip to the inner garden took far longer than it should have. In reality, the garden was less than a five-minute walk from Lucille's room, depending on which path was taken. Genkai purposely chose the longest path to the inner garden, wanting to provide an opportunity for Lucille to exercise when she wouldn't have otherwise.

While they walked, Genkai thought back to her conversation with Hiei again. While she has sympathy for the sick woman, she does not pity her and she will not baby her. If this woman wants to get better and will make the effort herself, Genkai will not provide a crutch or a handicap. Those kinds of things will not help her in the long run; she has to be able to stand on her own two feet if she wants to live the remainder of her life to the fullest.

They stopped in the middle of a long hallway where Genkai turned and slid open a door that opened to a porch similar to the one that surrounded the exterior of the temple. Lucille followed Genkai onto the porch and saw the inner garden in its entirety. Stone steps led from the porch down to a grassy area. In the center of the room was a small pod with a stone bridge stretching across from one end to the other. Surrounding the lower room was a three-foot wide sand garden, bordering the walls and stopping at each set of stairs before continuing. By the lines in the sand, it was clear these were not sandboxes to play in and build sand castles. On the other side of the room near the edge of the pond, Lucille spotted a low table surrounded by cushions and set on a comfortable mat.

Caught up in the beauty of the garden, Lucille barely noticed that Genkai had seated herself on one of the cushions and was patiently waiting for Lucille to make her way over as well. She leaned the edge of her cane against the wall next to the door and walked down the stairs. Genkai raised her eyebrow at that but said nothing.

"I would like to start by going over some things with you. Yes, it may seem clinical at points but this is how I will be able to determine where we go from here."

"Is this one of those psychological assessments that doctors do to determine if you have depression?"

"It's my version, now be quiet." Genkai's tone changed, morphing into one focused on the task at hand and not idle conversation. Lucille snapped her mouth shut and sat up a little straighter, conscious of the change and going with it.

"How has your appetite been?" Genkai closed her eyes, crossed her arms, and puffed on the pipe clenched between her teeth.

Lucille bit back the humor so ready to unleash itself, now was not the time. "It's normal. I've been sticking to a vegetarian diet as much as possible." _It's normal when I'm not the one doing the cooking. If it's me, I would probably starve._

"What do you normally do for physical activity and exercise?"

"I spend a lot of time in my garden at home and take short walks as often as I can." _And I run marathons every other weekend._

"And how are your relationships with your family, your daughter and your husband?"

Lucille paused at that question before answering carefully. "My relationship with my daughter is wonderful. She cares for me and tries to help me whenever I can. There are times where she helps TOO much, but she was like that even before I got sick." Lucille had no joke to follow with that.

"And with your husband?" Genkai pressed the question, knowing that Lucille avoided it for a reason.

"Our relationship could be improved exponentially. He struggles a lot with my disease and he doesn't know how to cope with it knowing the outcome; ultimately it's very stressful for him and I'm not sure how to help him through it." Lucille looked at her hands, knowing how Carrie would respond if she were here.

"I see. So is he the one with cancer or is that you? Based on your response it sounds like he's really the sick one. How do you really feel about his reactions to your condition? That first question was rhetorical, in case you missed that." Genkai opened her eyes and peered at Lucille, intimidating her into being open and honest.

"His reactions are uncalled-for in most situations. I understand that he's grieving and he does so in his own way, but he fights me instead of working with me. He decided to push me away instead of learning about everything so he could understand better for himself. That distance eventually changed into blame and resentment. I've tried talking to him to change the path he's on but as it is he wants nothing to do with me."

Genkai nodded, taking everything in. "How does your daughter feel about his behavior towards you?"

"She absolutely hates it. And I hate that my condition has put a rift between them. Whether I'm living or not, he will still be her father and their relationship should continue."

"You care a lot for the happiness of your family, despite how your husband treats you."

"Regardless of how he treats me, I still love and care for him. I want only his happiness even after I have gone."

Genkai nodded again, before sighing. "Unfortunately I cannot dictate how you handle things at home. But here I do not expect nor want you to blame yourself for the way people treat you. Your condition is not your fault, you did not ask or bring it upon yourself, and the people around you should understand that. That kind of attitude is not beneficial to you and to prevent yourself from falling into a depression of any type, you should try to change the way you view things both here and at home. You need to focus on yourself and feeling guilty for doing that only sets you back."

Lucille stared at Genkai in surprise; the older woman voiced several things that Lucille had kept to herself for years.

Her guilt over getting sick and putting her family through this.

Blaming herself for her husband's reaction and trying to be understanding instead of holding him accountable.

Her worry about her family being taken care of after she passes away.

Lucille did everything in her power to remain strong no matter what was thrown her way, never giving herself a chance to be weak. In all honesty, Lucille never even gave herself a chance to react to her diagnosis.

Genkai shut her eyes as different emotions crossed Lucille's face. _The first day and we've already had a break-through. I could give that TV Dr. Mike guy a run for his money._

Lucille covered her face as she felt her emotions take over, fear of Genkai's reaction forcing her to hide. She paused as she felt a hand on her shoulder, a comforting gesture from the older woman, and looked up in surprise.

"Do not hide your emotions, you are allowed to be upset and angry."

Lucille nodded and wiped at her eyes, stifling the tears until she had a private moment to let them out. "Do you have any more questions?"

"How do you feel about your changing appearance?" Genkai crossed her arms and returned to her initial demeanor.

"My appearance?" Lucille stared at Genkai in confusion, genuinely not understanding why her appearance would cause her any distress.

"Yes, the changes in your appearance that you have had to adapt to. The loss of your structure, your strength and weight. The loss of your hair. These things seem trivial but they do have an effect on your mentality." A tone of annoyance edged its way into Genkai's voice by the end of her sentence. At the time it seemed that Lucille was deflecting or playing dumb to get out of admitting to the truth about things.

"Oh I think my appearance is a non-issue in the grand scheme of things. On a smaller scale, it has affected me and I just haven't wanted to admit it. My husband doesn't look at me anymore. Small children are scared by my lack of hair and skeletal frame. I feel self-conscious in certain occasions. When I lost my hair, Carrie wanted to shave her head so I wouldn't have to go through the changes alone. But I refused to let her do it because it's not fair to her to have to face the same things I do on a daily basis. She's still young and impressionable."

"I see. Based on our discussion I think I have an idea of where I want to go from here. But we will continue with that tomorrow, after breakfast." Genkai stood from the table and turned to wait while Lucille stood as well.

"How do you feel after the assessment?" The question surprised Lucille, again causing her to wonder if Genkai knew how she was feeling this entire time. She was still surprised at the question and the irony of her own feelings was not lost on her. _Of course my feelings would be considered after everything, they are the whole reason we're even doing this._

"Strangely better, those assessments usually put me in a worse mood but yours was different. I think I'm going to spend some more time in the garden and see what I can come up with tonight." Lucille turned and began to head to the stairs but paused and turned back when Genkai did not move to follow.

"I have some developing I need to do myself. Go ahead and find your way back. Consider this your first test." Genkai smirked and sat back down at the table, settling down and getting comfortable.

Lucille chuckled and thanked her before leaving, making her way up the stairs and back out into the hallway. She slid the door shut and took in her surroundings, trying to getting a bearing on her location. Both directions looked the same, no distinguishing factors that would point her in the right direction and no windows to see outside.

' _My first test' huh. I'm about to be like the starving mouse stuck in a maze trying to find the damn cheese. Except the mouse eventually finds his way out._

Lucille finally decided to turn left, away from the direction they had originally come from. Call it a hunch but she had a feeling that Genkai purposely took her the long way to the inner garden., especially since she just called this a test. If anything, she would discover new things about the temple during her new adventure.

 _Getting lost is the most exciting adventure there can be._

Her going was slow but she eventually got where she wanted to be and in less time than it took to get to the inner garden in the first place.

"Well I'll be, tickle me impressed I didn't think I would be able to do it."

She stepped through the door of her room and looked around with a smile on her face, still struggling to believe the courteousness of everyone at the temple. She quietly slid the door shut behind her and headed for the door to the garden. She could feel the tears welling up in her eyes, overwhelmed with emotion. Finally outside, Lucille felt tears running down her face but she did nothing to stop them. In the privacy of the garden, she didn't have to worry about hiding her weakness. She sat down on the edge of the porch and gave herself the chance to grieve for herself.

After her meeting with Genkai, it made her think about what she was doing to herself. Five years of living with cancer and she never allowed herself to feel this raw emotion, she always just brushed it off and focused on something else. It never occurred to her how much of an impact this would have on her health. If she did this five years ago, would her situation be different? Would her husband treat her differently? Would she be as close to Carrie as she is now?

Calming down, Lucille looked out over the mess she created in the garden, trying to gather the motivation to put it all away. Well at least with everything pulled out of the shed she'll be able to put it back neatly.

The situation she was facing was a good analogy for her life at the moment. Everything is a mess and it's all bared to the world. And now she has to take the time to put each individual piece back again so she can be whole. How she puts the pieces back is what's important and she has to decide what to keep and what to leave behind. Her first day at the temple and she was already starting to make peace with herself. She couldn't thank Carrie more for pushing her to go to this scary place and seek help.

* * *

 _AUTHOR NOTE:_

 _Sorry for the delay! Not only was I stuck on this chapter, wanting to perfect it. But life got in the way for a while._

 _Thank you to my reviewers!: Leahcar-Soutaichou, Graphospasm, and Aria2302!_


	5. Puzzles & Projects

Chapter 5:

"Puzzles and Projects"

* * *

Lucille had arrived at the temple on Thursday evening. Her assessment of the garden and Genkai's mental assessment of Lucille herself both took place on Friday. That left Saturday and Sunday for the healing to begin. After breakfast Saturday morning, Genkai took Lucille back to the inner garden (taking the quicker and much easier way this time) so they could discuss how things would progress from there.

"My plan for you is to practice spiritual healing, focusing on the strength of your spirit energy and your outlook on your future. Yukina will be present at the beginning of each session to focus on your physical wounds while I focus on your spiritual ones. You can't heal your mind if you're concerned with bodily wounds. And for the process to be effective, you absolutely must trust in our technique and in us. Without that trust, you could potentially regress and your condition may worsen." Genkai's voice had a sharp edge to it, prickling Lucille's ears and causing her to wonder what Genkai really thought of her.

"You think I don't believe this method has any merit to it." Lucille crossed her arms and looked evenly at Genkai, the tone at the end making it clear she was making a statement and not asking a question.

"You were very skeptical upon your arrival and while you did not state it specifically, I have reason to believe you would not be here were it not for your daughter pushing you to seek help." Genkai matched Lucille's gaze, both women remaining stern and serious considering the weight of the topic.

"In that aspect you would be correct, I was very skeptical upon my arrival and simply wanted to show my daughter I was at least making an attempt to get better. But after my short time with you and the others, I realized that this could actually be possible and I am now devoting myself to my health, for my daughter."

"I hear your words but I do not feel the belief in them. This will not work unless you work to get better _for yourself._ Getting healthier for your daughter is a plus, but she is a grown woman and will survive without you. You must put yourself first above all else, you deserve that much for the things you claim to have done for your family."

Lucille was prepared with a snarky quip to enforce her side when she realized Genkai was right and she was shocked into silence. She didn't believe in the method, not really. What she believed in was Carrie's confidence in her ability to heal and get better. It was then that she realized she wasn't as positive about the outcome of her life as she originally thought.

* * *

Carrie set her phone down on her desk and smiled; she just finished a phone call with her mother who was happy to report the events of her first weekend at Genkai's temple. While not much healing went on, the two women decided to take the weekend to get familiar with each other and build trust. According to Lucille, without trust in her healer, it would be very difficult for any progress to be made. She needs to trust that Genkai is trying to help her get better and then believe in herself that progress can be made. Even with a death sentence looming over her head, Lucille absolutely needed to believe she could survive her cancer.

The end of their phone call continued to rattle around in her brain, making her worry about her mother.

" _Genkai hit me with some logic that I can't argue with and Pookie I don't want you to be upset, but we think it would be best if we kept you separate from my efforts to get better."_

The words stung and sent pangs through Carrie's heart, but she couldn't deny the logic either. If Lucille was focused on living for Carrie, she would miss the chance to live for herself. The best thing for Carrie to do is to cheer her on from a distance and step in whenever she was asked to. Thankfully they aren't forcing Carrie to stay completely out of her mother's life so she could continue to check on her and help her out with smaller things.

It was a little disheartening; Carrie wanted to be involved in her mother's recovery and instead she's told to stay away. But she would have to accept it if her mother was going to make any improvement; her feelings would have to take a back seat to her mother's health. All she could do at this point is focus on her schooling and support her mother any way she could.

Carrie looked around her dorm room with a sigh. Sometimes she amazed even herself at the mess she was able to create in such a short amount of time. She would forever curse the day she was born with an artistic personality instead of an organized one. The state of her room loomed over her and she wondered briefly how long it would take each task to complete.

Clothes were lumped together on her bed, clean and dirty mixed together in a large pile. That would need to be sorted and inspected so she could properly put them away and launder the dirty clothes.

Shoes were kicked haphazardly under her bed, pairs not matched together and winter shoes mixed with summer shoes. Her summer shoes would need to be stored so she wouldn't have to worry about them being in the way later. _HA right like that's going to happen ever._

Boxes sat piled and crushed in the corner by her closet, the bottom of each filled with an array of different items that had a purpose and a place somewhere in the room. _Who needs all of that crap?_ Carrie told herself to throw it all away and not look back, but sentimentality made her hold on. She would find a place for everything.

Books and reference manuals sat stacked on her bookcase, shoved as far back as they would good instead of placed neatly on the shelf. They would need to be separated and organized appropriately. While she loved reading Harry Potter, unfortunately the young wizard would not be able to tell her what was causing so much friction to occur in her engine prototype.

Her sketching supplies were scattered all over her desk and she cringed when she saw several pages of a mechanical diagram she was working on scrunched underneath a heavy reference book. Hours she had spent on the concept design for a more efficient hydroelectric engine and look how she treated it. She began gathering the books and pages up but paused when something on the draft page caught her attention. She quickly pushed everything to one side of her desk, clearing a space, so she would have an easier time following through with her sudden theory.

In her haste, several books and papers fell off the desk with a soft thump on her rug but she paid no mind to it, focused on developing her sudden epiphany. Her intention of cleaning and organizing her room got lost in the mess while she started working through the math involved in her theory so she could test it. After all, what kind of theory would it be if she didn't test it out? Her room could wait.

* * *

Lucille set her phone down on her dresser and smiled; she just finished a phone call with her daughter who filled her in on her class schedule and her new roommate in her dorm. It was a little upsetting how happy Carrie was to get away from her father, leaving the day after orientation to put her dorm together. Lucille thought back on her conversation with Genkai and forced herself not to take the blame for the separation between her husband and child.

 _It is not my fault he refuses to pursue a relationship with her._

She knew Carrie didn't blame her for their issues but she couldn't help but take some responsibility for it all. She smiled sadly, thinking about her final words to Carrie and her response to being let down.

" _Oh… mom I can't say I'm happy to hear that but I understand the logic behind it completely and I support your decision. Your health comes first before anything else and if you both think this is for the best then what kind of daughter would I be if I said no way?"_

Despite her positive and supporting words, Lucille could hear the sadness in her voice at being told to remain separate from the process; it wasn't fair to Carrie since she has done so much for Lucille already.

Lucille scrubbed her hands over her face, trying to dispel the negative thoughts and focus on her future. She would be leaving the temple to return home tomorrow and she still had to face her husband. She hadn't told him she was leaving and part of her wondered if he even noticed her disappearance. She wanted him to be involved in her healing but unfortunately he continued to be a weight holding her back which was ironic considering he thought she was holding _him_ back from his career.

She shook her head with a scoff before heading out the doors of her room and into the garden. The sun was beginning to set and dim light scattered across the yard, creating shadows that played havoc on the mind. For the first time in a long time, Lucille was at peace with herself. Normally by this time of day, she would be exhausted and ready for bed if not already asleep in a chair somewhere. But today, she felt alive and energized. If that wasn't proof that Genkai's methods were working, she didn't know what was.

Considering the amount of energy she had, she decided to put it to good use and began the preparation process for the garden. As she gathered her tools, she heard sticks breaking in the distance and turned to look over her shoulder. Memories of her encounter with the demon bat flooded her mind and she wondered idly if this would be a similar experience.

 _Except what if this demon doesn't care that I'm dying?_

At that thought, Lucille sucked her breath in through her teeth and held still, moving only her eyes to search for the cause of the disturbance in the trees.

After several tense moments of absolutely nothing, Lucille relaxed her muscles and decided it was safe because _surely_ a demon would have shown itself by now. She set back to work but kept one ear focused on any unexpected sounds.

Meanwhile, Hiei sat perched in a nearby tree, watching Lucille's movements. It is no surprise that he was the cause of the snapping twigs but he chose to remain hidden and simply observe the woman while she was alone. She was a confusing creature and he debated ending her misery now, regardless of what Genkai said. If anything he would be doing her a favor by ending her life while she still had some dignity left. He didn't know what Oseto-whatever was but if it was like most human diseases, the end of her life would not be pretty and he did not want to deal with the aftermath of her death if it occurred at the temple.

He watched as she began hacking away at a spot on the forest floor, shredding the grass and pulling dirt to the surface. Her actions confused him, but it seemed everything about her was confusing to him.

 _Why is she wasting her energy on the foliage when she has so little to spare?_

Lucille was an enigma to Hiei, there was no other way to put it.

The scent of salt hit his senses and his eyes focused back on her face where drops of sweat beaded on her forehead and dripped down. She reached up and wiped her arm across her face, clearing most but not all of the sweat. He wondered why she didn't use the scarf wrapped around her head but realized it didn't matter and he didn't care either way.

Lucille set the end of the tiller on the ground and leaned on the handle, observing her work. She had tilled up a rough, four-foot section of the garden. While she still had a lot left to till, it was definitely a good start to the garden she was imagining. The dark soil was fresh and moist, bringing a natural and earthy smell to the air. She breathed in deep, filling her lungs and feeling the tension release from her muscles. This was her element, this is what relaxed her and allowed her to cope with the cancer taking over her body.

The initial disturbance in the trees slipped from her mind as she continued to work, pulling up the earth and settling deeper into her relaxed state. The world and all of her worries slipped away from her as she focused on the garden.

Hours later she decided she was done for the night; she made great progress but there was still a long way to go. Her body ached more than usual, but it was a good ache, the kind that comes from hard work and not terminal illness. She made her way inside, planning a long and hot bath before turning in for bed.

Thanks to her diligence in getting the garden started, her mind was clear and she was more confident to approach her husband about this new process. She was at ease despite his pending reaction coupled with his poor history of handling change.

Hiei continued to watch her until she was safely inside the temple, the body of a low level forest demon hung over the tree branch next to him, inky blood dripping onto the bodies of two others. Her earlier efforts had attracted demons that did not care about the contamination of her dying flesh and wanted a simple kill. Silently and swiftly he had taken them out unnoticed by her. Beyond her acknowledgement of his initial movements in the trees, it did not appear that she noticed the demons approaching.

Her behavior was a paradox; she was clearly terrified of the demons in the forest but she was so entrapped by her project that she failed to notice her imminent death.

An enigma for sure.

* * *

 _Author Note:_

 _It's more difficult to write Lucille than I first realized it would be! I have a plan for this story and I'm so excited to write certain parts to it. The next chapter will be more action-y, even though this story is more character-based than it is plot-based._

 _Thanks to my reviewer Graphospasm!_


	6. Domestic

Chapter 6:

"Domestic"

 **Warnings:** Physical and mental domestic abuse.

* * *

The trip away from the temple was a lot easier than the journey there; Genkai called Lucille a cab that would pick her up at the base of the temple stairs so she could avoid the long walk this time around. When they told her the cab was coming, Lucille quietly wondered how it would make it over the footbridge she crossed on her way here, but logic and common sense stopped her from voicing her questions; there's more than one way to skin a cat right?

Yusuke and Kuwabara escorted her down the long stairs, making sure she didn't collapse and injure herself. Their concern for her warmed her heart and she decided she would bring them something on her return trip. The cab driver wasn't happy about the long drive but the cash that Yusuke handed the guy shut him up relatively quickly.

"Hey! What do you think you're doing?" The cabbie stared at her in shock, thinking she was yelling at him but Lucille ignored him, glaring at Yusuke instead.

He took the look in stride and just grinned back at her, "I have no idea what you're talking about!" He gave her a light slap on the back before dashing up the stairs and away from any fists she might have decided to throw his way.

Lucille made to start yelling but a look from Kuwabara stopped her, "You're a cool lady, we want to make sure we help you out when we can, ya know?" Lucille regarded him calmly before smiling and grasping his bicep in an appreciative gesture.

Kuwabara smiled back and opened the door to the cab for her, setting her backpack inside.

"Thank you Kazuma, but I hope you know this means I'm going to pay you boys back, with interest!" She wagged her finger lightly at him in a mock scold.

Kuwabara smiled back at her and laughed, "I hope you know there's no way we're ever going to accept that!"

Lucille glared at the boy but it lacked any heat; with simple parting words, Lucille climbed in next to her bag and leaned over as Kuwabara shut the door behind her and patted the hood, signaling that all were clear.

Despite her mental vacation in the garden the night before, Lucille was beginning to feel apprehensive about facing her husband. She explained her worries to Genkai and the older woman reminded her that she needed to confront her husband in order to move forward.

" _You already have an idea of how he will react. Now you need to use that and prepare for his reaction to this new change in your life."_

Genkai made it seem that as long as she was prepared, she would be able to handle any reaction her husband displayed to her frequent trips in the future. She didn't know David Galvin though and his reactions sometimes came out of left field.

She looked out the back window and smiled at the two boys who were waving goodbye to her halfway up the stairs. She lifted her hand in a soft wave back to them and hoped they could see her. Anticipating the long trip ahead, Lucille shut her eyes and leaned her head against the door frame, contemplating what she was going to do when she got home.

* * *

Lucille stepped through the door to her home, listening for the sounds of movement so she could locate her husband. She heard faint classical music coming from somewhere in the house; David Galvin hated classical music but loved listening to it while he worked. According to him, he would ignore the music in favor of his work, thus making him focus better.

She carried her bag in and set it at the base of the stairs, lighter than it was when she left. Since she planned on returning regardless of what David said, she had taken Genkai up on her offer to leave things at the temple to make it easier on her on the next trip out.

Following the sounds of the violin crescendo, Lucille slowly let her feet and cane carry her to her husband's home office. He hated when she bothered him while he was working but this was a conversation that could not be avoided or put off. The door to his office was cracked and the music got louder as she approached. As she pushed the door open, she knocked lightly on the wood, trying to get his attention. Without looking up from his papers, David sighed heavily and shut his eyes.

"What do you want, Lucy? You know I don't like to be bothered while I'm working." He did not move or look at her but his hands stopped moving as he waited for a response.

"I know honey, I just wanted to tell you that I'm back from my trip and I was going to cook dinner." Lucille stayed in the doorway, using the frame to shield the majority of her body, expressing her discomfort with the conversation.

Her attempt to distract him with food, however, did not work. "Your trip? What do you mean, you've been locked in your room all weekend." He finally looked at her, disbelief in his eyes. She did not comment on the fact that he called it _her_ room and not _their_ room.

"No... I left Thursday night. I went to see a spiritual healer at Carrie's suggestion."

David let out a heavy snort paired with an eye roll any teenager would be jealous of. "A spiritual healer? What the fuck do you think a spiritual healer is going to do for you? They can't fix your broken body and your spirit lost any hope for it a long time ago."

Tears crested Lucille's eyes, she knew his reaction would be harsh but she still was not prepared for it. "Since traditional medicine isn't working Carrie thought this would help me live a little longer. And after meeting with the healer myself, I have to agree with her."

"Lucy, babe, seriously get real. An old hag claiming to be a healer isn't going to do a damn thing for you. She just wants my money and there's no way I'm giving it to you to pay for shit like that."

"We've already discussed a payment and it has nothing to do with money!" The anger at his accusation of Genkai surprised her, she had gotten closer to the woman over those few days than she had realized.

He yelled back: "I don't care what kind of payment you discussed; you're not going to see that bitch again, it's a waste of time!"

"And I don't care what you say, she cares about me and she is going to help me!" A childish stomp followed her final words, her fists clenched tight against her thighs in defiance.

David did not speak at first; he placed his hands down on his desk, palms down and fingers splayed, before standing to his full height. Anger could be physically seen as it rippled through his body, his hands shook as he pulled them from the desk. He stepped back and walked around, heading toward Lucille. "I will not have _my_ wife going to some crack-pot spiritual healer. Do you not understand how humiliating that would be for me in my position? I will not stand for it!"

Lucille, not expecting his next actions, stood her ground and stared defiantly up at him. "Is your precious job more important than the health of your loving wife?"

"Loving? Ha! Don't make me laugh. You haven't loved me in years, how could you when you've been so selfish and focused about yourself?"

Lucille bit her tongue and refrained from pointing out his redundant statement. "I have loved you the best that I can David but you have fought me ever since I was diagnosed."

He got closer to her and tightly gripped her shoulders, fingers digging in painfully. "It's not _my_ fault you got sick. How dare you say that when I have been here through the entire thing? Don't you even think about the effect it has on _me_?"

Lucille shrugged her shoulders, trying to get him to release the tight grip he had on her, but he wouldn't relent. "You're not the one who is sick and dying!"

A sharp slap resounded around the room before dying out beneath the sound of the violins still playing in the background.

"How _dare_ you!" The accusation in David's voice was harsh and unexpected but Lucille could not speak for the shock that held her in its grip.

Before she could even make an attempt to voice an argument, _any_ argument, David grabbed her biceps and shoved her roughly against the frame of the door. His hands were so big they completely encircled her emaciated arms. Lucille cried out, silently begging him to just _stop, please stop_ but that did not stop his rampage and she felt her bones creaking and cracking from the force of his hands. The cancer made her bones fragile and they could not stand up to the pressure that was being placed on them right in that moment. She attempted to stop him from shoving her into the wood a second time, her small hands pressing feebly against his chest but that only forced him to push harder.

 _How will I ever explain this to Carrie and Genkai?_

All thoughts of the people who actually cared about her fled her mind as a third shove forced her skull to snap back against the frame and she was out before she could even watch the floor rise up to greet her.

* * *

When Lucille woke up, she was still on the floor directly outside David's office, the frame pressing painfully against her spine. She rolled carefully from her side to her stomach, slipping her arms under her so they were trapped between her breasts and the floor. A wave of dizziness washed over her with the movement and she carefully rested her forehead against the cool and welcoming wood. Her upper arms and shoulders ached painfully but she couldn't tell if anything was broken; a sharp, pounding sensation resonated from the crown of her skull, most likely from where her head hit the wood; the skin of her right cheek stung where he had slapped her and the vision in her eye was slightly blurry, she could only assume it was beginning to swell.

She moved to push herself up and off the floor and when she did, sharp pains raced through her shoulders. She quickly released herself and dropped back to the wood floor with a soft thump, resting her head again to keep the nausea at bay.

 _Obviously I was wrong about nothing being broken._

Lucille knew she couldn't go to the hospital or call an ambulance; they would question her injuries regardless of her terminal disease and she knew the blame would be placed on her husband. If he attacked her the way he had just for standing up for herself, she could only imagine how he would react if he thought she was telling people he abused her.

She absolutely refused to tell Carrie what happened, Lord only knows what the girl would do in her defense and there was no way she was putting her in danger. Besides, after just starting school she didn't need the weight of that on her mind.

She could call Genkai but based on the treatment she received from the temple's other inhabitants she had no doubt in her mind the end result would not be pretty. Yusuke and Kuwabara were worried about her walking down a set of stairs by herself for Christ's sake.

She couldn't run because well, to be frank, she had nowhere to go. She didn't know Genkai well enough to be comfortable enough to seek long-term shelter from her. Carrie lived in a dorm at school and she wouldn't jeopardize that for her anyway. And the rest of her relatives lived overseas, in America. The only other option was to live on the streets but she wouldn't survive very long in that position.

She could confront David about what happened but she feared that would only increase his anger and she would come out worse because of it. It was bad enough that it happened at all, but to point it out to him and say _hey asshole you were wrong_ , he wouldn't take it well.

It seemed like the only option she had available would be to stay at the house and pretend like nothing happened. It was the safest choice anyway and besides, he's never hit her before this incident. Chances are he felt guilty for what he did and it wouldn't ever happen again, right?

 _He was just angry, he wouldn't do that again, he loves me too much._

Ultimately, Lucille knew better but she was in denial. His behavior and attitude towards her has only gotten worse over the years and any outside party would look at their marriage and see it coming. She just refused to believe he was capable of something like this.

Resigned to her choice, Lucille carefully slid her knees under her and pulled herself from the floor using the door frame for leverage. She would act as if the abuse was a fluke and then she would go to Genkai's temple again in two weeks. Until then, she would do what she's been doing whenever they were in the house together; Lucille would keep to herself and avoid her husband at all costs so she didn't upset him further.

Her body was still shaking by the time she was able to stand fully; it had taken her several minutes to get up from the pain she was in and she was scared. Looking around the hallway, she wasn't sure how long she had been laying there. It was mid-afternoon when she returned home from Genkai's and now barely any light made its way in through the windows.

 _It must be late. Did David go to bed already?_

Lucille walked carefully through the hallway until she made it to the front door. A quick peak outside at the driveway told her he had left with no indication for when he would return. She breathed a sigh of relief and felt some of the tension leave her body.

 _At least I have some time before I have to see him again._

Stepping into the kitchen, Lucille made herself a quick and easy meal that Carrie taught her before she left: salmon and white rice. When her meal was finished, she reached into the drawer next to the sink and grabbed at a large knife with shaking fingers. She held the handle but did not lift the knife from the drawer, contemplating removing it at all. She couldn't believe she was in such a position with her husband of all people. This was the man she married, the man she vowed her life and trust to, and here she was planning to carry a kitchen knife around with her for protection? _From him?_

Lucille turned the knife clutched in her fingers, the light reflecting on the blade and into her eyes. She gasped when she caught her reflection in the shiny metal; the skin around her eye was red and angry and swollen, a bruise already beginning to form. The evidence of his abuse shocked and scared her; it made it all the more real and harder to cover. Right then, she was grateful she agreed to meet with Genkai every two weeks instead of every week.

Despite her earlier resignation to pretend that nothing happened, she no longer felt comfortable leaving herself unarmed. Especially since she wanted to take a bath to ease some of the pain in her body and that meant she would be leaving herself at her most vulnerable. With a deep and shaky breath, Lucille pulled the knife from its home and carefully shut the drawer before heading up to the bathroom.

The white tile was bright and hurt her eyes and her headache came back with a vengeance, lessened previously by the food she consumed before her bath. Moving quickly and carefully, she lit some candles and set them around the bathroom sporadically before shutting the harsh lights off. She shut the door firmly, listening for the lock to click home. Despite the sound echoing off the walls, she tugged and turned the handle, ensuring that it was indeed locked, before she relaxed enough to strip and get into the bath.

She leaned her head back against the edge of the tub and stared into the ceiling, going over the events of the day again.

"What went wrong?" Lucille knew that was a question that she probably would never be able to answer; things started going wrong when she first got sick. But she could never figure out why David got so defensive at her diagnosis. He took it personally, acting as if she got sick _on purpose_ to hinder his career. That's all it was ever about with him and she hated it; things were _so good_ when they got married and the love they had for each other was impenetrable.

Tears began to slip from her eyes and before she could ebb the flow her emotions had taken over and suddenly she was sobbing. She loved her husband _so much_ but lately she didn't like him very much but she tried to poke and prod their marriage back to life. Her thoughts changed direction and she started wondering what she could do to make up for what had set him off earlier that day. What he did wasn't her fault but she couldn't help but take the blame for it. This all started when she got sick so when you got right down to the brass tacks, _she_ was the catalyst that set everything in motion. She stared forlornly at the ceiling, wishing she could go back five years to when she was first diagnosed and change how she handled the news.

In the distance, she heard a door slam and her breath hitched, fear gripping her chest tightly as she began rubbing at her face. She wanted to clean herself up so he couldn't tell that she had been crying; if she was crying he could think she was blaming him and not herself. She carefully got out of the tub and dried off before pulling her clothes on. They stuck to her in the places she missed with the towel but she ignored it and unlocked the door, stepping out of the room with the towel balled in her arms, the knife hidden carefully inside.

"Lucy? Luce? Where are you?" David's voice had a pleading tone to it, as though he were worried she had left the house completely.

Lucille took a deep breath and walked through the bedroom and toward the hall, she did not want to call out to him but she worried what he would do if she tried to hide. "I'm here darling, in the bedroom."

His footsteps padded along the carpet at a quicker pace and she saw relief blossom on his face when he laid eyes on her. "Lucy! There you are!" She was not prepared when he grabbed her delicately in a hug and held her to him, one hand pressing her face into his shoulder and the other across her lower back. Lucille stiffened in shock but held tightly to the bundle in her arms, the tip of the knife pressing gently into her arm through the towel. She did not move to put her arms around him in return, scared the knife might slip out of the towel or worse, stab him accidentally.

David put his hands on her shoulders (Lucille's vision blackened at the corners when he did this, memories of earlier playing through her mind) and held her at arm's length, a look of concern on his features. "Honey what's wrong? Are you not feeling well?" He pulled his right hand from her shoulder and brushed it along the side of her face, seemingly feeling for a fever or some clue that she was ill. She flinched when his hand got close to her face but he ignored it as if it never happened.

"Y-yes, I'm not feeling well… I took a bath and now I'm feeling very tired…" She didn't know how to respond at first. It had been damn near five years since he asked how she was feeling, let alone show any concern for her well-being.

"Well, let's get you tucked into bed! I'll go make a cup of tea for you, you just settle in and get relaxed!" David placed a kiss on her forehead before turning and exiting the room, leaving Lucille speechless and jaw hanging.

 _What in the world…?_

Several minutes passed by and Lucille could hear him moving around in the kitchen, pots clanging together as he searched for her tea kettle. She snapped her jaw shut with a click and looked around the room, wondering what her next step should be. She contemplated ignoring his command and doing her own thing, but she was curious how far he would take this newly-developed behavior. With her bundle still wound up in her arms, she stepped over to the bed and slipped the knife between the mattress and the bed spring and with a gentle toss, the damp towel landed with the other dirty clothes. Soon she was climbing into the bed, reclining against a mound of pillows and blanket bunched up under her arms.

At the sound of feet carefully walking along carpet, Lucille shrank back into the pillows and pulled the blanket further up her chest, heart thudding in desperation. Would he use the tea as a way to hurt her, claim she spilled it on herself on accident? She was not expecting him to stop through the door with a bright pink, flowery teacup and a smile. He walked over to her and set the teacup on the table next to her before reaching for her face again. Lucille flinched and it was once more ignored by David as his hands moved passed her face to the pillows behind her, fluffing them up to make them more comfortable.

 _Good thing I didn't stick the knife there…_

His behavior confused her but she said nothing, not wanting to break the spell. She wasn't happy that he abused her the way he did but it _did_ bring along this change in him. Would he stay this way until she passed? With this about-face, would he now be more open to accepting her decision to seek help from Genkai?

"Here's your tea Lucy, just the way you like! I put two teaspoons of sugar and even added an ice cube so it would cool down some." He smiled at her and stepped back, letting her grab the teacup for herself and set it on her lap. He waited patiently for her to taste the tea, only moving when she finally took a sip and smiled hesitantly at him. He smiled back brightly before stepping around to the other side of the bed and climbing up next to her. He turned their TV on and then moved down the bed, nestling his head carefully into the space where her thigh and her hip met. A sigh of contentment escaped his lips and then he was silent, watching his show in peace.

Lucille bored holes into the back of his head, hand shaking as it held the cup. She looked down sharply when a strong tremor made the hot liquid slosh out and onto her hand but she said nothing, not wanting to draw attention to herself after he had just gotten comfortable. Would she forever be terrified to set him off again? Would she ever have peace?

"I love you, Lucy."

The words sounded foreign on her ears and she would be lying if she said she didn't miss them.

It took her a long moment to respond, but she eventually did. "I love you, too, David." She felt his hand squeeze her thigh right above her knee, a gesture of affection she hadn't seen nor felt in ages. The feelings it brought were as foreign as his words and she welcomed them, pushing away any thoughts she had about his earlier actions, and instead enjoying the moment they were sharing together, as husband and wife.

* * *

 _AUTHOR NOTE:_

 _Well, that was… unpleasant. And then pleasant?_

 _Thanks to those who reviewed!: Graphospasm, Candyfiendnomnom, and Aria 2302!_


	7. Trepidation

Chapter 7:

"Trepidation"

* * *

The next two weeks were some of the best days Lucille has had since she was diagnosed with cancer. She spent every day with David.

Some days were spent wrapped up together in their bedroom watching their favorite movies from their childhood. Those days were reserved for when Lucille was at her lowest and could barely make it out of bed; days which David used to dote on her endlessly by bringing her breakfast, lunch, and dinner in bed and all of the snacks in between.

The ones she could keep down at least.

When she was sick, he would sit dutifully at her bedside, holding her hair back and holding up the sick bucket so she wouldn't have to lean over as much. Then he would help her clean up and bring her water and toast to calm her stomach.

Other days were spent out in the garden together.

He had barely shown interest in her gardening in all of the years they had been married. And he definitely never ventured out into it unless he was snatching food when she wasn't looking so this was definitely a change. David was asking her questions about the different plants, seeming genuine and not as if he was just filling the silence with empty words. He seemed to understand when she wanted the quiet, and his questions would peter off for some time while she got lost in the flora.

She was most surprised when he would step up to lend a hand and help her carry her tools in and out of the shed. That was something he had never done, even when she was healthy and whole.

It's too bad those days didn't last.

Lucille stood quietly in the bathroom, toes scrunched against the cold tile of the floor. Her eyes roamed across her face and naked arms, taking in the fading bruises that marred her complexion. They looked sickly green but luckily the swelling had gone down. Not wanting to draw attention to the incident, Lucille stuck by her decision to not go to the hospital to see if David had broken anything. She turned on the spot, glancing over her shoulder to look at her back in the mirror. A dark, deep bruise spread between her shoulder blades, surrounded by the yellow-green color.

 _There's no way something isn't broken there._

Lucille flexed her back and shoulders, testing the muscles and the bones there. She got almost completely through an entire rotation of her left shoulder before a sharp pain made her cringe, her muscles locking up in shock. She slowly eased her arm back down, reaching back and testing the area with her finger tips. The sharp pain returned in some spots, where the bruise was at its darkest. Lucille sighed and started testing her right shoulder in the same fashion but luckily got through it without pause.

Once she was done with her examination, she covered her face with her hands and squeezed her eyes shut as hard as she could. She squeezed them so hard that spots started forming behind her eyelids and tears leaked out of the corners. She wanted to hide from the reality of her life, close her eyes and wish it all away. Unfortunately that wouldn't work; she wasn't a child anymore and her problems didn't go away just by closing her eyes and pretending they didn't exist. No matter how long she closed her eyes, her problems would still be there waiting for her when she opened them again.

With a great heave of breath, she dragged her hands down her face, stretching her features into a grotesque mask. When she let go, her skin sagged in response and slowly molded back into the natural form of her face. The sickness was evident in every cell of her body and she wasn't sure how much longer she would be able to make it, especially with David's changing attitudes. Her emotional and mental stability would crumple if David went back to his behavior before the incident, it would be even worse if he jumped between the two.

From the floor she collected the dark, long-sleeved sweater she had discarded, pulling it over her head to hang lightly from her bony shoulders. She stared at her face in the mirror again, knowing she wouldn't be able to hide those bruises as easily as the ones on her back and arms.

A yellow-green halo surrounded her right eye, where David slapped her. The swelling had gone down considerably in the two weeks since the incident but the bruises were still taking their time to fade.

 _How will I explain this to them? Surely they will ask._

Lucille went over her options, debating the best way for her to pass off the bruises as something minor.

She could say she walked into a door?

 _No way, too cliché. No one will ever believe that, especially a psychic and a temple full of demons._

She could say she slipped in the tub after a bath?

 _That has potential but it still might not work._

She could say she was ripping at a tough root in her garden and the tool slipped and she caught herself in the face?

 _That. That is gold. Well, maybe not gold, but it'll do._

Lucille ran her hands over her scalp, her fingers brushing against the short, crisp hair on her head. Her hair started growing back ever since she stopped the chemo treatments but she wasn't ready to go without her head-covering just yet. She grabbed a brightly-colored head scarf, hoping the color would distract from the changing colors of her face. It was a long shot, as the colors stuck out harshly against the paleness of her skin. She straightened her sweater, sighed again, and smiled at herself in the mirror. The skin of her lips cracked and her cheeks ached from the effort.

Suddenly she didn't feel so confident anymore.

 _How can I lie to these people? All they want to do is take care of me. But this isn't their battle, it's mine._

Lucille nodded at herself, her resolve set in her decision, and walked out of the bathroom, turning off the light as she went. She stopped just outside the door, staring at the empty duffle bag that rested on her bed. She's supposed to leave for Genkai's today, two weeks after her initial visit at the temple. But she put off packing until the very last minute.

She wanted to believe it was because she didn't want to leave. David's change in attitude and his behavior over the past two weeks has been amazing and she can honestly say she missed him. She missed the way they were together and the way he took care of her.

Like she mattered.

Like she was important.

Like he loved her.

But in her gut she knew it wasn't meant to last.

She knew that wasn't why she was putting it off.

Lucille was worried about what David would do if he saw her packing and planning to leave on another trip to Genkai's without his permission. Not that he would let her go anyway, if the way he reacted to her first trip were any indication. So her plan was to pack her bag after he left for work and leave before he came home. So he would never know what she was planning and he couldn't stop her from going.

The only thing she would have to worry about is what he would do when she returned.

She left the kitchen knife tucked between the mattress and the box spring, just in case.

* * *

Genkai sat on the porch of her temple with a cup of tea. A stern frown rested on her face, evident by the tightness of her eyes and the firm set of her lips. The door behind her slid open and a pair of booted feet stepped out onto the porch to stand beside her.

"You're worried about her."

Genkai closed her eyes and sighed at the statement. "I'm worried _for_ her. She's supposed to arrive today and I have a bad feeling."

Red eyes slid over to stare at her, one eyebrow raised slightly in question.

"She mentioned some things to me about her _dear_ husband, and I worry he'll attempt to inhibit her journey here in some way."

"Tch. Only a fool would waste their energy on someone who is going to die anyway."

A smirk graced her lips. "Unfortunately Miss Lucille married one of the biggest fools in Human World."

"Would you like me to check on her for you?" Genkai looked up at the demon, her own eyebrow raised in surprise.

"That's very kind of you Hiei, but I think waiting is best for now."

"Tch." Hiei walked off the porch and disappeared into the trees. Genkai watched after him, curious about his uncharacteristic offer. She decided to pay it no mind and continued to ponder the potential predicament her new partner might have put herself in. If Lucille had yet to show by the morning, Genkai would ask Hiei to check on her. Until then, she would wait.

* * *

David walked through the front door of his home, excited and nervous to see his wife. In his hands he held a box of chocolates and a bouquet of daisies. You see, daisies and chocolates are Lucy's favorites and since it's their anniversary, he couldn't help himself. David just knew she would be happy to see him and surprised that he remembered their anniversary.

He remembers their anniversary every year, she's just always too busy to celebrate it with him. Sometimes it's with Carrie, sometimes she claims she's too sick.

But not this year.

This year, David made _sure_ she wouldn't be too busy for him and he decided to take the day off work so he could spoil his wife. He left for work like he normally does so she would have no idea of his plans to surprise her.

David gently shut the door behind him and called out into the house. "Lucy! I came home early to surprise you, my love!" But he received nothing in response from his wife.

Suddenly concerned for her health and safety, his heart racing, he jogged through the house looking for her. "Lucy!"

He looked in the back yard where she normally gardens but didn't see her. He checked the bedroom, in case she wasn't feeling well, but it was empty. Finally he checked the kitchen, the only other place she would spend her time since it had the biggest windows and the best view.

The kitchen turned up empty, like all of the other rooms in the home. The only difference about this room was a small, red envelope left on the counter next to the coffee pot. Confused, he slowly picked up the card, recognizing his wife's neat handwriting spelling out his name.

 _My dearest David,_

 _I'm sorry to leave on our anniversary, but I planned to visit Genkai this weekend and I don't want her to worry if I don't show for our meeting, considering my health. Since you typically work on our anniversary, I assumed it wouldn't be an issue and that you would instead enjoy the time to yourself. You deserve a long and relaxing break after taking care of me and making sure I'm comfortable!_

 _Upstairs, you'll find that I've set up the bathroom to be the most relaxing atmosphere, simply for you to enjoy and relax yourself without a care or worry!_

 _Love always,_

 _Your Dearest Lucy_

The cheerful anniversary card was crumbled and tossed into the trash, followed by the chocolates and the flowers.

 _How_ dare _she blame our previous anniversaries on me?! After all I've done for her! That bitch!_

It looks like this year they wouldn't be spending their anniversary together, after all.

* * *

Carrie sat at a secluded table in the library, surrounded by books and notebooks and various writing instruments. Staying organized was much harder than she initially thought it would be and she slipped behind in the time since she started school.

Her short attention span seemed to be working against her.

Carrie shoved her textbook away and covered her eyes before dragging her hands down her face in a grotesque mask. With a sigh, Carrie grabbed her planner and flipped it open to see the entire month. Her eyes widened when she saw that it was her parent's anniversary and she immediately reached for her cell phone, intending to call her mother to see how she was doing.

She stopped with her finger on the call button and bit her lip, knowing what her mother would say. Plus, if her father answered the phone and she wished him a Happy Anniversary, it might turn out to be even worse for her mother. Which is not something she wanted.

She set the phone down and grabbed a blank piece of paper, starting a letter to her mother knowing that her father wouldn't care to read it.

She missed her mother quite a bit, especially their long talks every morning over coffee.

Carrie stopped writing her letter for a moment and grabbed her planner, flipping to the next month. At the end of the month there would be a long weekend for a holiday, and it was on the same weekend that Lucille would be visiting the psychic.

With a smile, Carrie continued her letter, deciding not to tell her mother of her sporadically-planned trip so she could surprise her. She addressed the letter to Genkai's temple, just in case her father decided to start reading his wife's mail in the past few weeks.

With something to look forward to, Carrie set her resolve on getting as much work done as possible so she could get ahead and not have to worry while she was away from school.

* * *

Lucille stepped off the train that took her to the city nearest to Genkai's temple. She huffed slightly and pulled her duffle bag higher on her shoulder, trying to ease the pain setting in her back. Her normally achy body was exacerbated by the injuries from the incident with her husband.

 _I really need to invest in a rolling suitcase._

Lucille chuckled, quietly reminding herself that spending any money would be a waste as she wouldn't be around much longer to use it.

Her bleak outlook on life was beginning to get really concerning.

Her attention was caught by a map hanging on a nearby wall. She walked over to it to verify her route, but soon furrowed her eyebrows in confusion. It appears the long path that the taxi took her along previously was unnecessary. Annoyed by the sleazy taxi driver, Lucille dragged her finger along the map, charting out a new and much shorter route to the temple.

 _Well, no sense in worrying about it now. At least I realized it_ before _I made that long trip a second time._

Lucille turned around and looked for the exit, eager to start her long walk to the temple. It was a nice day and the sun would be good for her skin. On her way to the door, she was distracted by a young man playing a cheerful tune on his guitar and she stopped to toss some loose change into his guitar case.

 _I may not have much to give, but if I can put something back into the world then I will._

Her husband would have disagreed with her, however. He would argue that it's a waste and the poor kid should get a job instead of asking for handouts.

Lucille always made a point to slip change to young artists on the street when she was out.

* * *

By the time Lucille reached the stairs to the temple, she was tired and weary. Despite the shorter route she found, her sick bones couldn't handle the stress from all of that walking. She looked at it positively and kept reminding herself that walking was good for her health, both mental and physical.

She reminded herself quite often.

About every half mile.

It became a mantra that she repeated to herself and by the time she reached the temple steps she was chanting it aloud, like a soldier repeating a cadence during a run.

"You know they say talking to yourself is a sign of insanity."

Lucille started at the deep voice speaking from the trees to her right, snapping her head in its direction and brandishing her cane like a weapon. Lucille could hear the same voice chuckling, followed by the rustling of leaves and branches. A few loose leaves fluttered to the forest floor before a pair of boots landed amidst them. At the sight of the demon she relaxed and returned her cane to its normal position at her side.

Lucille made a mocking face at Hiei's comment and replied earnestly, "You know they say stalking is a sign of obsession."

"I'm flattered that you are admitting to your obsession, but really I don't think we're a good match for each other."

Lucille wasn't prepared for Hiei's comment, thinking he would take offense at the statement. Instead, he turned it around on her as if they had long been friends and this was something they did normally. With a snort, she began her slow trek up the temple stairs, intending to pace herself and make it there without any breaks.

"Now what makes you say that I'm stalking you and not the other way around?"

Hiei followed alongside her, hands in his pockets, ignoring the small huffing sounds she was making as she moved up the stairs. Lucille glanced at him out of the corner of her eye as she walked, waiting for a response but receiving none. She looked forward and continued walking, appreciating his company even if it was a silent one.

 _He hasn't said anything about the bruises…I wonder if he noticed them or just doesn't want to ask?_

As if he heard her thoughts, Hiei glanced at her out of the corner of his eye in a similar fashion to her, looking forward after just a few moments.

Despite her slow pace, Lucille still had to stop a few times to rest before continuing on. Hiei remained respectfully at her side before continuing on with her when she was ready. By the time they reached the top of the stairs, Lucille's face was flushed and she was short of breath. But she continued on without complaint.

Hiei was surprised that such a small, weak human could battle this disease without whining the entire time. Healthy humans like Kuwabara and Yusuke were known to complain over the slightest inconvenience.

 _Tch. The fools could learn a thing or two from this human._

Hiei walked Lucille to the main door of the temple, opening it for her and then heading off into the forest again. Lucille turned and whispered a thank you, hoping he heard it before he got too far off, before heading into the temple.

As she stepped through the door to the kitchen, she was welcomed by Yusuke's blunt question, "What the fuck happened to your face?"

So much for going by unnoticed.

* * *

 _Author Note:_

 _I'm sorry for the long absence. I took some time to focus on my mental health and take care of myself. Which was followed by a lot of big life changes which included a move across several states. But here I am!_

 _Thanks to everyone that's reviewed while I've been away, Enjoy! :)_


	8. Honestly, I'm Fine

Chapter 8:

"Honestly, I'm Fine"

* * *

A small breeze blew through the door, fluttering the fabric around her face and making the bruises more noticeable to the group of faces that swiveled in her direction. With a smile and a short pause to shut the door calmly behind her, Lucille made her way to the table to sit and rest.

She had a choice to make here: open up and tell them all the truth or make an excuse and hope they didn't press the issue. Yes, she had her excuse all prepped and ready to go when she was dreading it at home, but she honestly wasn't expecting it as soon as she walked through the door.

She chose to stick to her original plan and delivered her line with ease, as if she were practicing this moment her entire life. "It's a little embarrassing Yusuke and I'd rather not make more of a fool of myself than I already have."

"Uh huh." Yusuke squinted his eyes at her and leaned forward across the table before lidting his arm to rest his elbow in front of him and pointing his finger at her. Not knowing the power behind that single digit, Lucille simply raised her eyebrow in return but said nothing. Kurama shifted slightly in his seat before placing a hand on Yusuke's and pulling it down.

"Don't be rude, Yusuke."

Yusuke batted his hand away and continued staring, but complied and rested his palm flat on the table. "You know lady, I can smell a lie from miles away. So don't be lying to us about what happened to you." Genkai snorted from her place at the table and rolled her eyes.

Lucille smiled again but said nothing, hoping he would just let it go. Unfortunately, Yusuke is extremely stubborn and letting things go just doesn't happen for him. Not one to be ignored, Yusuke got up from his chair and walked around to where Lucille sat. With a flick of his ankle, he pulled out the empty chair beside her and sat down, resting his arm on the back of her chair. With a smile of his own, Yusuke continued to stare at her, hoping his silent intimidation would get her to open up.

"You'll only laugh if I tell you and an old woman is not meant to be laughed at. So move along."

If possible, Yusuke's smile widened and he leaned closer to her. "We can just have Hiei read your mind and get the information that way. That way you _can't_ lie even if you tried and we'll know if we need to go put the hurt on someone."

"I'm under the impression that Hiei is more of a gentleman than that, seeing as how he saw me before all of you and chose not to mention my face."

"He doesn't have to mention shit about your face, he just needs to look and see what happened."

"He's not a dog waiting to perform tricks when asked. Honestly Yusuke, I'm fine. The only 'someone' that you're going to need to put the hurt on is my shovel at home. Now get out of my face or brush your teeth."

Across the table, Kurama choked on his drink and covered his mouth, laughter shining in his eyes. Affronted, Yusuke sat back in his chair and crossed his arms, a frown marring his features.

"A shovel, eh? Now why don't I believe that?" Lucille said nothing, sipping at the water that Yukina placed in front of her moments before. She set the glass back on the table, rotating it slowly with her fingers and watching the water ring beneath it spread. Just as Yusuke opened his mouth to start arguing again, Genkai cut him off with the soft slam of her mug on the table. He scoffed and rolled his eyes, for once taking the hint and closing his mouth, letting the issue go.

"Yeah, yeah. I guess you are pretty fragile." He stood abruptly and returned to his original place at the table, flopping into the chair like a bag of potatoes.

Eyes alight with mirth, Kurama slid his chair over and away from Yusuke as he tried and failed to discreetly smell his own breath. He glanced out of the corners of his eyes at everyone at the table before exhaling heavily into his cupped palms. When he glanced up at him again, he froze as he realized everyone was looking at him in silence. Yusuke cleared his throat and coughed a few times into his hands, attempting to conceal his original actions.

Still chuckling at Yusuke, Kurama smiled at Lucille across the table. "How was your trip in today Lucille? Did you have any issues this time?"

Lucille looked up from the larger circle of water she created on the table and smiled back, pulling her hands from the glass and back to her lap. "No no, I thankfully didn't have any issues this time. I _did_ take a different way in though that seemed much easier and faster and avoided the long walk."

"Have you eaten yet?"

"It's been a few hours, but I'm not hungry. Though I'm off the chemo medicine, my stomach still doesn't handle food all the time and unfortunately today is not a good day." At that comment, Yukina paused on her path to the table, stood still for a moment, before turning back to the kitchen. Curious, Lucille watched her as she went, wondering if something she said had upset the young demon. Kurama's voice drew her attention away from the apparition.

"Besides the nausea, have you been feeling any better? How are your bones feeling?"

Lucille smiled again, hearing the concern for her well-being in his voice. "Better than when I was on the chemo, that's for sure. I do have bad days where I can't even get out of bed, but overall I feel better and I have a lot more energy."

"Has your body—"

"I don't think she appreciates being asked all of these personal questions about the changes she's been experiencing, Kurama." He clicked his teeth closed and glanced at Genkai before settling back into his chair. "I understand your inquiries are for the benefit of your knowledge, but sometimes an old woman just wants to be left alone while she recovers in peace."

"It's alright Genkai, he's just curious about the medical nonsense. Sometime this weekend Kurama, find me while I'm working in the garden and I'll answer all of your questions. How does that sound?"

"Yes ma'am, I apologize for being pushy. I've just never personally spoken to someone with this condition, especially one such as yours." He scratched the back of his head, looking away as a light blush graced his cheeks.

"I don't mind, honestly. But for the sake of not spoiling everyone's dinner, let's save this for another time, yeah?" As she spoke, Yukina rounded the corner with a few serving dishes of food, setting them on a table before turning back to the kitchen. Lucille lifted herself out of the chair to assist in setting up dinner, but Genkai reached over and placed a soft hand on her forearm, pulling her back down to rest in the chair with a slight shake of her head. Lucille relaxed her arms, resting herself in the chair once again. A frown settled on her face, her helpful nature not wanting to let the poor girl do all of the work on her own. Moments later, Yukina walked back to the table but this time, she went directly to Lucille. Seeing that the young demon held a tray in her hands, Lucille rushed to clear the table in front of her, confused by the gesture.

In front of her lay a tray with a bowl of soup and a plate of crackers.

"I heard you say that you weren't feeling well, and I know you're not very hungry but I hope this soup helps to settle your stomach some. If you aren't ready for it now, I can take it away and bring you some later on once your appetite is up?" Yukina seemed nervous; concerned that Lucille would turn her away and reject the offering.

"Oh honey, you are so sweet and I appreciate this so much. You know, I wasn't hungry at all until I smelled this delicious soup. I think I'll even be able to eat the entire thing!" Yukina smiled shyly and bowed, turning around to settle in her own chair.

Lucille caught Genkai's eye and they shared a silent look, both understanding what the other meant without words.

Dinner went quickly without incident and true to her word, Lucille finished her entire bowl of soup and all of the crackers that came with it. Surprisingly, her nausea eased up enough so she couldn't actually enjoy the entire meal. Though Genkai stopped her from helping Yukina bring out the food, she would not be stopped from at least helping clean up. Since she couldn't walk and carry the dishes because of her cane, Lucille stood carefully at the sink washing and drying while Yukina cleared the table.

"Thank you for your help Miss Lucille."

"Oh honey you don't have to thank me. I am more than happy to do my share of the work. Besides, it gets done faster with the two of us anyhow." Lucille smiled at her and continued her work, shifting her weight once Yukina moved to stand next to her to take over drying.

* * *

Since the evening came quickly, not helped by Lucille's late arrival to the temple, no therapeutic work would be done until the following day. Lucille agreed to meet Genkai in the inner garden in the morning and she made her way to her room.

Opening the door to her room, Lucille glanced around and smiled. No, it wasn't as large as her bedroom that she shared with David. But it was peaceful here. Anger and resentment didn't exist in her body and she could truly relax in the space that was all her own. Looking at the bed, she noticed the sheets were turned down, as if someone came in to prepare for her arrival. There was also a glass pitcher and a glass on the dresser, so she wouldn't have to travel far to ease her thirst in the middle of the night.

Tears welled in her eyes as she realized the extent they have gone to make her feel welcome and comfortable. The only thing she needed was her daughter Carrie, but asking her to come here just to make a sick woman happy while she had school to focus on was unfair. Wanting to gather some peace from her garden, Lucille made her way across the room but stopped as a sharp pain spread across her back. Stumbling slightly, she pressed her hand into the soft mattress and leaned heavily on her cane, her breath coming out in gasps. This pain was new, unlike the daily pain she was used to in her joints.

After several moments in this position, the pain eased a bit and she slowly lifted herself back to standing. It was another few moments before she was able to continue her journey out to the garden. The pain didn't return but she held tight to her cane in case it did, not wanting to fall if the pain struck her again.

In the darkness of the garden, Lucille relished the soft breeze the caressed her face and the sound of the cicadas as they buzzed in the trees. It was always a beautiful sound that she enjoyed every moment she could. It was also one she didn't hear as often as she wanted. Stepping forward, she eased herself onto the top step of the stairs and relaxed, breathing in the calm that filled the silence and her heart.

A pair of sharp red eyes appeared in the trees across the clearing, drawing her attention away from the sway of the branches as the wind flowed through. The eyes made their way closer, but Lucille was not scared. They were familiar to her now.

As Hiei drew near, Lucille smiled and shifted on the step, moving over to create space for Hiei. He paused at the bottom of the steps before taking the silent offer.

"I sensed your fear."

Surprised, Lucille looked at him but he simply glanced at her out of the corner of his eyes.

"And your pain." He looked away at that, but Lucille did not.

"Yes, there was fear and pain. But I'm fine now; it went away after a short while."

Hiei nodded, "Will it come back?"

Lucille sighed and looked down at her lap, rubbing her hands up and down her thighs softly. "That's a hard question to answer. Honestly yes, it probably will. Do I know when? No more than I can say when the next comet will pass by here in the stars."

He said nothing and they sat there together in silence, looking out at the night sky.

"Thank you."

Hiei looked at her, an eyebrow raised in question.

"For coming to check on me, you didn't have to but I appreciate that you did."

"Tch."

Lucille set her hand on his knee and squeezed gently before releasing him and bracing her cane between her legs. Heat blossomed in her shoulders and knees as she stood but she continued on, used to the pain she was feeling. She stood still at the top of the stairs, enjoying the night and not wanting to head inside yet.

"Did he do that to you?"

Lucille sighed and closed her eyes, not wanting to answer. She was sure he already knew the answer anyway and just wanted to hear it spoken aloud. "Did who do what to me?" She chose to play dumb, hoping to avoid that awkwardness that would soon follow.

"Tch. Don't play dumb." He stood up quickly beside her and turned to face her, red eyes gleaming in the night. "I don't have to read your mind to know the excuse you gave the detective earlier was a lie."

Lucille sighed again and turned to look him in the eye. "Yes, he did this to me. He did it because—"

"Do not make excuses for that fool." He was angry. Evident from the tone and inflection of his voice.

"Regardless, it won't happen again. He's made up for it and we're better now. I'm fine. Everything is fine." Lucille turned in her spot, prepared to walk into her room but a warm hand on her arm stopped her. Hiei's unflinching gaze bored into hers and held her immobile.

"It won't be a one-time thing. Humans like that don't know how to restrain themselves. They abuse their power and prey on weaker humans. Don't let him kill you prematurely."

Lucille placed her hand on top of his and he pulled away as if she had shocked him. "Honestly, I'm fine. I've made it through worse and I'll make it through this. It won't happen again."

"Tch." Hiei turned and disappeared, leaving Lucille alone on the steps outside the door to her room.

* * *

Early the next morning, Lucille was in the inner garden, sitting across from Genkai. A steaming pot of tea sat on the table between them, a mug on either side of it. Since the psychic had yet to get a cup of tea, Lucille reached out and poured a mug for her before preparing one for herself. As she cupped the mug in her palms, Genkai regarded her calmly, still not yet speaking. They had been sitting at the table in silence for nearly an hour, no instruction or questions on today's events.

 _I wonder what she's thinking._

"Why did you serve me before serving yourself?"

The question surprised Lucille, she honestly didn't think about who she served first, just that she wanted tea and thought Genkai might as well.

"I didn't think about it honestly, it's just a natural to me to take care of others."

"Why is that?"

Lucille shut her mouth and then opened it to respond but Genkai cut her off.

"Is it because you think everyone else is more important than you are?"

Lucille shut her mouth but this time she didn't open it again. Because it was the truth and she knew it. Genkai knew it too and she stayed silent, wanting Lucille to admit the truth.

"Genkai, I'm just an old, sick, dying woman. I won't be here much longer, so why should I come first?"

"If that's the case, why don't you just kill yourself?"

At that comment, Lucille set her tea down a little too hard, spilling the hot liquid on the table. Genkai didn't react, maintaining her cool expression. "Well?"

Lucille struggled to speak, words not forming in her mouth. After a few moments of gaping like a fish, she was able to get out a coherent sentence. "I only have a few months left. Carrie would be devastated if I ended it early. She would understand, but I don't want to put her through that."

"Besides Carrie, what's stopping you?" Lucille stared across the table, confusion evident on her face. "Let me rephrase, if Carrie didn't exist, what would prevent you from killing yourself?" Genkai set her cup down and leaned forward. "Give me an 'I' statement. Not 'Carrie needs me' or 'So others won't be burdened'. Give me a reason directly involving _you_."

Genkai leaned back from the table and crossed her arms, waiting for Lucille to deliver as asked.

"An 'I' statement?" Either Lucille was purposely avoiding the question or she was really this stupid. Genkai hoped it was the former, or the lady was a lost cause.

"Yes, yes. Like 'I have cancer' or 'I am being disingenuous'." Lucille's lips popped open with an audible pop; Genkai's comment left her speechless, unsure of how to respond to that. "Sometime today would be preferable, honestly."

Lucille sat quiet for several moments, thoughts and statements floating through her head. There were a lot of things she could say, but she wanted to be honest and sincere with the psychic. She knew that being a smartass would get her nowhere at this point.

' _I'm weak'? It's fitting but I don't think it's what she's looking for._

' _I'm scared'? Again, fitting but not what she would want._

' _My life is worth something and shouldn't be thrown away'? That's good but it just doesn't seem right…_

Lucille stared at her hands as thoughts whorled through her mind. Genkai sat patiently, knowing that the woman was actually putting thought into and not just searching for an appeasing answer.

"I…" Lucille stopped almost as soon as she started, laughing at herself. The statement she settled on was incredibly cliché but it fit perfectly. "I shouldn't have to cut myself short because others _might_ think I'm a burden." She clasped her hands in her lap and looked firmly at Genkai, sure of her response.

Surprisingly, Genkai smiled. " _That_ is exactly right. That is what I want you to remember, whether you're here with us or being abused by your worthless husband."

Lucille stared at the woman in shock, though she knew she shouldn't be surprised. The old woman was perceptive and there's no way she could have lied to her and gotten away with it.

"Don't look so surprised. I knew the moment you walked through the door. And that excuse you gave the moron was average, at best. No fool would actually believe that's what happened."

"Why didn't you say something when Yusuke was interrogating me about it?"

"If you want to stay with a husband that abuses you, that's no one's business but your own. All I can do is offer honest and helpful advice and hope you choose wisely. And hopefully get you to realize exactly what an idiot you're being."

* * *

After spending several hours talking with Genkai, Lucille was exhausted. She walked through the halls, making her way to her bedroom. It was still too early for dinner and way too early to go to bed, but she could spend some time in her garden while she waited.

Though Genkai could see through all of her excuses, Lucille still found it difficult to open up about what happened that day two weeks prior. Yeah, Genkai knew what happened, but that still didn't make it any less embarrassing or uncomfortable.

It's funny that telling the story aloud to someone who would listen sure made her feel like she was the one who did something wrong, instead of David. She knew that wasn't the case but she couldn't help that nagging voice in the back of her mind telling her that if she never went to the temple, David would never have hit her.

She settled back on the stairs, going over the questions that started this whole train of thought.

' _Why did you serve me before serving yourself?'_

' _If that's the case, why don't you just kill yourself?'_

The questions chased each other around her mind.

 _That was a great question Genkai, why don't I just kill myself..._

* * *

 _Author Note:_

 _Sorry folks, it was just a perfect spot to end it!_

 _Thanks to all of my reviewers!_


	9. At Peace

Chapter 9:

"At Peace"

* * *

It was a long night for Lucille. She worked a groove in the grass in front of the stairs to her room pacing, thinking, wondering. At times she circled the garden, reviewing her current work and what she still needed to complete. She made sure not to venture too far into the surrounding forest, remembering her first encounter here. She was dying, but that death was already coming quick enough.

The evening stretched on, the moon rising high in the sky, casting moon shadows across the grass in front of her. Different insects started singing their buggy songs in the trees around her, working together to create a melody that you can only hear once you are far away from the city. Dinner time came and went, but no one came out to find her. She had been perched on the porch for a while, part of her waiting (and quietly hoping) that someone would ask her to join them for dinner. The other part of her peacefully contemplating her life and enjoying the calm silence of the garden.

She slowly got up from her place, her bones creaking and a deep ache settling into her joints. Her body wanted to rest but her mind would not give her a moments' reprieve. Her earlier pacing had been rushed, hurried. But now she moved with a slow steadiness, heading toward a slightly overgrown patch of her garden. With a heavy sigh she sank down to her knees and began tugging at the various weeds that littered the healthy and wanted plants. It seemed that with each weed she pulled, she removed a worry from her mind.

By the time her chosen patch was clear of weeds, her mind was finally at peace and she could go to bed, no longer worried about her future or what little remained of it.

* * *

Genkai raised an eyebrow at Lucille's cheerful smile, almost confused with this sudden change in attitude. It appeared that this person in front of her was a completely different woman from the one she worked with the night previously.

"You're certainly cheerful this morning for someone who didn't have dinner last night." If possible, Lucille's grin grew even larger.

"I had a real good night." Lucille reached forward and grabbed the tea kettle. Genkai paid close attention to whose cup she filled first and a smirk settled on her lips at what she saw.

"That's it, just a real good night? Care to elaborate?" Genkai accepted the offered mug. "Did something happen that I should know about?"

"No, nothing happened." Before leaving her room that morning, Lucille made the decision that she would not share her late-night thoughts with others, even Genkai. While she had no doubts that Genkai would support her in any choice she made, there was something she wanted to do on her own. She felt bad; during her short and very few visits to the temple the two of them had gotten rather close and she knew Genkai would go out of her way to offer any assistance she could. But Lucille did not want anyone to go out of their way for someone who may not be around long enough to be able to return the favor.

"Well, alright then." Genkai quietly sipped her tea for a few minutes, allowing Lucille to settle in and find her stillness. This took longer than anticipated, as Lucille wouldn't stop fidgeting. After a while, Genkai spoke up, "We're going to be spending today meditating and building spiritual strength. Normally I would do this with some sort of physical activity, building the strength of the spirit and body together to create uniformity. But yours is a special circumstance that we need to accommodate."

Lucille nodded, understanding completely. She settled into a more comfortable position, focusing on the peace in her heart. That focus is what helped her find her stillness and allowed her to meditate for the time that Genkai wanted.

While Lucille meditated, Genkai observed the sick woman; she focused on the healing bruises around her eye, the awkward way she carried herself, and the tension that settled in her shoulders. When asked, Lucille would say that she's fine, nothing is wrong. But her body said something else entirely. Genkai could see the pain she bore every day, the stress of her disease weighing on her soul. Looking closely, any spiritually-aware person could see that her spirit energy was beginning to diminish, her aura hugging tightly to her body instead of expanding with life, reaching out to touch the life force of others.

She was dying, that was clear to anyone who cared to look. And though her doctor said she had an entire year left, Genkai believed that she had even less time than that. And between this visit and the previous one, that time decreased dramatically. She frowned as she looked at the bruises again, wondering if her husband's behavior cut her life shorter. A woman like this should be cared for and loved, not beaten and isolated.

Genkai decided to ask Lucille a question she anticipated would be refused, "While you're here this weekend, would you like Yukina and I to heal you?" Genkai did not need to speak the obvious. They both knew their healing would not come close to touching the cancer that riddled her body. But the least they could do is attempt to relieve the pain of the physical wounds she bore. With a woman such as this, it was likely that she would decline the offer, not wanting to burden someone else with her problems.

After a few seconds more of stillness, Lucille finally opened her eyes and looked at Genkai with a smile, "Yeah, I think I would like that."

It's not often that Genkai is surprised.

* * *

Lucille lay on a soft mat in the center of a quiet temple room, gathering in the space around her. She was unsure of the exact purpose of the room she was in; there wasn't any furniture other than some large, soft pillows and no windows or exterior doors. There was a small altar in the center of one wall, with a row of lit candles lining the back of it. It appeared that it was a prayer room, but she had no idea who they paid homage to. Perhaps with the assortment of people that flowed through these temples grounds, the room was simply a place for spiritual reflection with doors open to anyone who needed to reach out to someone.

Alone, the room had an odd, ethereal feel to it. As if you could feel the presence of all the different deities that have been called to this room.

For someone close to death, that presence was a lot stronger.

Thankfully, Lucille was not alone. Genkai was currently to her left, sitting on one of the soft pillows with a mug of tea in her hands. Lucille glanced at her before taking a deep breath and turning her gaze to the ceiling. She started counting the pieces of wood in the ceiling, waiting patiently for what was to come. Trying to distract herself from the soft voices that whispered delicately in her ear.

She was nervous for sure. Being new to the world of demons and the supernatural, she didn't know what would come with being healed by a demon. Would it hurt? Would it change who she was physiologically?

By the time Yukina arrived, Lucille had counted fifteen support beams and two hundred and seventeen wooden slats that filled the space between the support beams. She was not able to finish, leaving the pointless question of how many wooden slats it took to fill the space above. The young demon flew through the door in a rush, a slight tinge of pink on her cheeks.

"I sincerely apologize for being late Master Genkai." She delicately flopped herself down on Lucille's other side. Lucille silently considered the grace required for that move, anyone else would have dropped like a sack of potatoes at the speed Yukina moved into the room.

Genkai huffed a bit and waved her hand at the young apparition. "No matter, I'm sure Lucille enjoyed the time to prepare herself." Genkai's statement had Lucille raising her eyebrows. She was supposed to be preparing for this? How in the world was she supposed to do that? But the twinkling in Genkai's eyes told her she was only teasing; that did nothing to ease the bubble of anticipation in her gut.

Yukina smiled at Lucille and situated herself on the cushion with her feet folded underneath her and her hands folded in her lap. Genkai cleared her throat and set her mug on the tray beside her before sliding it out of the way.

"Before we begin, I urge you not to move during the process no matter what you might feel. It will only drag it out further." Lucille's eyes widened at the implication behind those words, fear gripping her belly in a tight knot. She nodded slowly, suddenly beginning to regret agreeing to this.

Genkai and Yukina stretched their arms out over Lucille's body; Genkai's hands over her head and chest, Yukina's hands over her belly and hips. The spiritually-aware would see a soft pink glow emanating from Genkai's hands and an icy blue from Yukina's hands, not too far off from the color of their hair. Lucille saw nothing but the color of their skin, though she felt the effect of their powers on her body. Warmth, similar to the feeling of the sun on one's skin, spread out from their hands and slowly encompassed her entire body. The places where her injuries were the worst began to itch and it took all of her willpower not to move her arm to scratch at them. She could see why Genkai had to caution her against moving and why it might elongate the process.

From Genkai's position, she watched the bruise on Lucille's face go through the remaining stages of healing before disappearing completely. She didn't know what other injuries existed, but she was sure they were going through the same process. She could see the discomfort on Lucille's face, fighting the urge to move and scratch at any healing injuries. This process for healing wasn't an easy fix, it just sped up the body's natural healing process. Unfortunately that meant it went through every stage of the process, including the uncomfortable ones.

Genkai and Yukina spent a long time with their hands splayed over Lucille's body. It took a lot longer than Genkai originally estimated, which spoke volumes for the true damage done to the woman's body. She discreetly glanced at Yukina, noticing the subtle signs of strain beginning to show on the young demon's face, though she would never admit to the pressure she was feeling. Genkai slowly increased her output of power to relieve the strain on Yukina and the change in her face was almost immediate.

A short while later, Lucille sneezed, disrupting everyone's concentration. "Sorry. The inside of my nose was itchy."

Genkai and Yukina laughed, lowering their arms and helping Lucille into a sitting position. They could no longer see that exterior damage that was done to her body and Genkai knew the interior damage could never be fully repaired. She looked closely at the older woman, observing any changes in her features that might indicate how she was doing. A slight flush had come to her cheeks, replacing the cool paleness that existed before. The dark rings under her eyes had disappeared. A subtle strength returned to her muscles, leaving no room for the feeble weakness that existed before.

To the unknowing, this woman is a healthy human being, cancer-free and full of life. They would never know the damage hidden underneath the soft and delicate skin.

Genkai continued to watch Lucille quietly while Yukina helped her off the floor and out of the room. She had an uneasy feeling settling in her stomach but she couldn't quite figure out why. She believed they did a good thing that day, providing Lucille a temporary relief from her pain. Why, then, did it feel so wrong? Why did she get the sense that something bad was going to come from this?

Lucille turned to look over her shoulder as she walked out. Genkai was sitting in front of the simple alter, a cigarette dangling between her lips and lazy circles of smoke floating above her head.

* * *

 _Long break, short chapter. This story will be ending soon, I already have the ending planned out in fact._

 _I took a long break because what was happening in my life took priority. I've gone through things that I've been wanting for a long time and things that I never thought would happen to me. But I've been thinking about this story on a regular basis recently and I want to finish it instead of leaving everyone hanging._

 _Thank you for your continued support and for understanding._


End file.
